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 Jan 2018 Carlie Sims
Max Araujo
Back to my sixteenth worst nightmare, waiting anxiously for the sign so long awaited that has never came; I demanded an explanation from the universe. I needed to understand the reasons for all that conspiracy. Even when I could hear those voices saying together so loud and clear, I was completely hollowed by the muteness breeze blowing between the maze walls. - I was trapped!
            The well-known melancholic vultures were guarding my back while guiding me to the dungeon of my usual agony. It seemed like the universe wanted a proof right from the strength of my convictions. Like a violinist tries the strength of his violin's strings, the universe demanded me a proof of my true feelings and emotions. The wave frequency emanated from my will had to be graciously aligned with the exquisite symphony played among the expanding galaxies. - But how could I reach such grandiosity if I had been exposed to so many naughty frequencies before? Maybe another interference from the underworld in an attempt to extinguish the remaining source of light inside of me, imposing once again its absence of color. Breathless, I felt my soul weak. I had no more reasons or strength to struggle against the darkness. - It was all over me!
           
Trying to find an explanation for my pain in the obscurity of the nights and the madness within my mind, I suddenly realized that those answers I was looking for all my life were hidden behind the sunrise and not in the bowels of the dark as I used to believe before. I just had to close my eyes, dive into my dreams and wait for a new day to come.
            As if God himself had blown into my ears the biggest secret of all, revealing me the truth, I've always searched for, another sun has risen in the sky. Like a sublime little sight from paradise, the smells of the white dew unfold the covers from my eyes vanishing all tears and bringing a tender relief to my disquiet soul.
            As the most fortunate living creature, I kneel before your majesty to receive through the heat of its clarity, all the blessings I had wished for myself. Full of beautiful emotions, those resplendent feelings were difficult to describe because of the complexity of its singular form. Flooded of passion, I dipped in a luminescent clear jubilee leaving all the frightening fears far behind.
            Grateful for his magic touch on my front, I was now ready to radiate the path on my own wherever my ways would take me. Even in the darkest caves, away from the reach of its power, his light would shine bright to protect the virtue of my essence. The devil's secret was forever revealed between those confusing messages. I could finally perceive those unwelcoming sounds understanding how he used to nourish himself from those solitary and derogatory talks. But nothing could hurt me ever again because I was aware of his traps; I was now able to release myself from his claws and search for shelter under the protection of my savior’s wide wings.
            Covered with his feathers, my spirit could finally have a peaceful rest. In his arms, I felt like lulling one last time. In those arms, I felt warm like I was used to feeling in the safety of my mother’s lap, falling asleep intoxicated by the softness of her voice and solace of her simple songs. Lying on his chest, I recognized the gentle beat of her heart close to mine. As her love, his care and affection recovered the integrity of my true nature. Safe by his guard, I was able to build the foundations of the man I had to become; one who would have the right to deserve his inspiring love in the most literal way.
            As a winged hero, he pulled me out from the wreckage, cleaned me up, treated my wounds, gave food to my spirit and showed me the doors of heaven. Crossing those doors I found the beauty he had always told me about. On the other side of those doors, I could finally find my lost self.

Max Araújo
I miss looking in the eyes,
Not your eyes...but the eyes of someone
Who actually cares for me!
Your eyes are filled with hipocrisy...
You don’t even want to look at me...

I miss holding someone’s gane
And feel the warm feeling
That runs through my heart!
With you I had none of that...
With you I only felt cold...

I miss being loved
But I don’t miss loving someone
Because throghout this time
I love you with all my soul
And got nothing in return...
 Jan 2018 Carlie Sims
S Smoothie
...

A whisper on the wind
carried news of your impending arrival

even the birds held their breath,
not even a twig deared snap in anticipation.

You were one one of
the 12 great mysteries of life.

But I  saw through you.

You took far more than I was willing to give unwittingly.

I am my own mystery,

so I whistled sweetly crunching on soft twigs
suffering all the hard stares and curses of the woods.

But, these are my woods,
my fields of green and my happiness never depended on you.

I wont hold my breath or on to any false hopes.

I know what there is to seek,
and what I don't want to find,

I know what I am.

Do you?
I'm such a stoner lazy-******* that I sit w/ a joint in my lips; fingers on the computer keys typing out virtual truths, meaning gravity waves are moving through me & I can feel the background radiation in Chet Baker's horn & I wonder...in a few minutes Bill Bixby's Hulk will be on, followed by (Miss America) Linda Carter's Wonder Woman from the 70's, she is hot & *******-dressed & super-moral & cute & stylish for the era---the Hulk is a Freudian wet-dream; who wouldn't want to be that guy I'm sure Stan Lee has thought profoundly before cranking out his jumping India Ink jive w/ Kirby on pencils & Ditko on inks...Lou Ferrigno really pulls it off, turning the comic book into Shakespeare; ****** Gravity waves! I love them; they make my gurl possible; her shape & consciousness formed by the width(x)diameter equal to the radiation's vector(place=here is where the hypothetical 'machine' rests/the device which makes TT possible(no known device exists) In other words, everything a woman can do can be done w/o a woman except giving birth ...
Stay clear of the green that
longs to take over the blue area,
it represents what should not be
forgetting that what would be
is also in existence.

The need to understand overshadows
the requirements for a person’s sanity.
Insanity probes, forges and let’s go
but does it stop in the midst?

In the midst, it grows and
reproduces but also, can be lost
in the midst of a deep gaze.

The deep gaze is that that
let’s us go on in the midst of it all.
In the midst of blue,
so many things happen but one thing is constant
jealousy would always be green and
blue peace and tranquility.
JOURNEY

Wearing a thick fog
the mountain ventured

into a nearby valley
as suddenly and silently

as a mountain could
if it so choose.

The night also aided
and abetted its efforts.

It splashed through a wide river
and over a geographical border

to the next country
without anyone being anything

the wiser.

It saw towns
and more humans

than it had ever
seen in its life.

The noise and activity
troubled its thoughts

and it turned and returned
before the new day dawned.

It decided to stay
in the place where it was

born
clutching a morning to itself

winking at me

telling me to tell
nobody

of what I had seen
of its wandering

or the thoughts
that lay sleeping

in its great
granite mind.
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