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Karijinbba Jun 2019
Just like Goddess Kali
I am feared when not
understood
my enemies know my loving passion are my kids
those demons slander me
fearing the mother
goddess in me
I gave life and inadvertedly heartbroken waived it
I give life
birthed my children
against all adds
motherhood apeaces me
injustice enrages my dance
I am Goddess Kali Karijin
~~
Precious daughters
Elena Rose Jeanette fear not
I save I protect I write
it's my frenzied dance
surounded by demons ferocious
you and me won many a
gruesome wars
to protect you three your
children alike my light
I have deamed
Remember Mother Kali
I love you miss you
more and more
and for you my life I lay
~~~.
The goddess mother
(excerpt)
~estranged from kids ~
~~~~~~
"The stars are blotted out,
    The clouds are covering clouds,
It is darkness vibrant, sonant.
    In the roaring, whirling wind
Are the souls of a million lunatics
    Just loose from the prison-house,
Wrenching trees by the roots,
    Sweeping all from the path...
The sea has joined the fray,
    And swirls up mountain-waves,
To reach the pitchy sky.
    The flash of lurid light
Reveals on every side
    A thousand,
thousand shades
Of Death begrimed and black."

love & motherhood apeace me.
~~~~~~~
By: Karijinbba
inspired
by Hindi ink Durga-Kali
Shiva Lord's Wife
revised 06-5-19
~~~~
the poem shows how the whole universe is a stage for the goddess's terrible and frenzied protector dance.
only motherhood
apeaces the mother in me
estranged motherhood ends me.
thats why childless foe slander me
~~
my grown children imagine
their enemy's darkness in me.
~~
Durga is Kali Lord Shivas wife
represent good & bad apeaced
by being Loved cherished
and motherhood instict
RH O negative Mothers like me
may abort on medical evil advice
if no Rhogam vaccine is
affordable by Mother to be.
not that we ****** child to be.
Karijinbba May 2019
My father's sister Salome crossed the rainbow bridge she was my French and native link to family root I found after 28 years appart
My daughter Rose drove us to a nearby ocean front to apeace
my grief, breathing in the gentle
sea breeze and sitting on the sand together
Other people enjoyed beach activities too
I had water in a paper cup
but no food remained in a bag,
when a crow unexpectedly landed alone by my side
no other raven/crow were seen.
perhaps attracted to my silvery long hair flying maybe from
my daughters house 1 mile away from Marina where I often fed crows and ravens cat food.
This raven/crow's feathers glistened in magestic dark bluish green hues. I'd caress its plumage but didn't not to ***** it
it wasn't my purring feline!
It deared trust me further  though pointing it's beak at my cup of water and it drank thirstily as I held it joyfully to its beak gently quietly as it drank;
then it pointed its beak
to the empty bag so I
appologized moved in regret
for no more food was in it.

My girl took photos of this awesome moment but she
never mentioned its greatness again my Rose simply said something unexpected to me
"don't feed crows in my home"
Jeff does't like them around!
and I felt her tongue's needle
also in my heart!
Such rare moment in time
a universe in itself!
time had stoped!
with a hungry raven/crow
this tender moment
lived only in my memory
without the pictures taken
untill now sharing one crow's gentle greatness and courage
to land close to one human
seeking food.
The graceful raven/crow's
encounter!
Rosie's own loving mom,
instantly reveared and
trusted BEST by a greatful intuitive trusting creature
a raven/crow!
How special it made me feel!
to choose me by the sea.
How deep my girl's comment
stung that since married
Rose behaves indifferent
where once tenderly moved!
wrongly misguided by
strange racist bad people 
Rosie"s hill billy superstitious
ignorant white trash in laws.
My evil ex's sister ugly snake
in every Mothers paradise
a "fat pig" she calls herself a Mansons advocate almost
turned me into a murdered pregnant Sharon Tate!
Lizz in the habit of arranging
calls to my three girls in laws, sons in law, my old boss at various employment
bussnessess a hate crime of old
saying my name and cursing them so I get fired then telling my girls nobody liked me at work either! brain washing them
and assassinating my character!
Lizzz since age 12 a drug user ******* to control rage in her brother two pees in a pod
my ex once told Lizz in a moment of lucidity;
"you'll never be half the
woman my Mexica-American beautiful wife is."
Since then my life is hell
No. I don't blame Lizz shes mad
I blame myself trusting her
hearless impotent brother
my grown girls are under their spell they mingle with vipers now
Surely even a courageous
greatful raven/cow has
more grace and common
sence to trust me Mom
to nourish and care for it.

This is my life in the big
apple USA
who wants my script!?
it's up for sale!
povery is a *****! please hurry.
or I'll be famous after death!.
~~~~~~~~
By:Karijinbba
All Rights Reserved
Revised 4/2/19
(excerpt from my memoir!)
(AA/Bba/Asg. (proudly)
We all have snakes in our paradises
I am proud to make friends with raven/crows cats dogs poets and pietessess who read write and understand who is who and judge
not on greed the haves and have not i choose wisely between good evil criminal or victim I feel ballanced on the justice skale I am passionate stern but understanding forgiving and second chances appeal to me best.
Thanks for your time.
Karijinbba Jul 2021
Now what do we poets do
When we fall in love ?
Unable to sleep the
Master bedroom frozen,
Their divan on fire.
Hearts longing throbbing
fire and ice peach cobbler
can't suffice to apeace.
Brains deeped in energies
of color purple in hearts.

Her poet longing for her diamond cave behind
her Jimmie Angel,
And El Salto del Moro
Waterfalls!
His poetess thirsting
for his jewls
behind his Dhrudhiya
swelling on monsoon
His Padajhar Mahadev
Waterfalls
She's dreaming with his
Mount Abu
in Rajasthan.

Thus the poets
lay throbbing, longing
Sketching love's honey pots
The poets bunny bees!
Lay enamoured
by their waterfalls abliss..
~~
By Karijinbba 2021
All rights reserved
A life true story of poets in love
Karijinbba Aug 2021
Today and for a few days now
I just had to look at your photos
different ones two of them
In one you wore a tie and one other from a while back and I
felt like a billionaire everywhere.
I felt a different kind of wealth
A peacefulness about it,
in places too mystical to share.
A rush of lightening quickened
my breath and happiness never
felt so real as in looking,
at your photo more for it's inner worth though your outercore
is mostly holy for me.
I love you to tears in every look
and best that midnight criptic
shadowy one I cried all night long
with this one, and in love the most.
A verse asleep in memory chip, awakened me, you love me.
your love apeace my entrails.
Beloved of God divine.
~~~
You maketh me to lie down in green pastures:you leadeth me beside the still waters.
You restoreth my soul: You leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for your name's sake.
Alhough I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear NO evil: for thou art with me;
thy ROD and thy STAFF
they comfort me.

Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over precioso.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life:
and I will dwell in
the house of you my Lord
my beloved for ever.
~~~~
By: Karijinbba
https://youtu.be/UYfKRR6ZW7A
Karijinbba Mar 2020
Hold me holy lover sinner
worldly lover mine twin soul,
like Rhett Buttler
beheld Scarlet in his arms
as she sobbed

hold me speace me madly
love me long like
Rae Ingram (Nicole Kidman) and her husband, John (Sam Neill),
held each other on their yacht
rocked by oceanic waves in
Dead Calm!
 
Oh beloved gold key come stay rock me hear my plee

regardles of names time and space or sand hour glass
I love you
fly to me I am wearing my red robe waiting for you up the magestic flight staircase,
the captured sacred
chronological dream spell
impregnating imagination

come up quickly search for me
inside your master bedroom
kick the door if you must
grab me apeace my despair
find me shivering in the closet burning with anticipation
save me hold me
put my fire out gold hearted lover mine
praying eons isolated hold on to your photograph
patiently waiting for a word
news thwt you caré as promised
I am breaking save me

Pop up the bubbly bottle is chilled O sweetheart sweety pie
I long to get high with you
fill up my cup full
twist my gold lock open with your
gold key Enter me! I can't live without you

let the fireworks begin to sing
I adore you do with me as you
please
eternity is ours to love
let me devour you apeace me
the nights long the days and eves long ***
see you ginham shirt buttons popping up strong long
pants zipper tearing up
my He-Man Ruddy divine

the nights eons long I sought you
out of time and space is only for the devil not for true love.

I have dreamt with this dream
since you and I carved it
lovingly photographic memory
and all once upon a time
has come suddently

and though another soul grabs
you tieing you down
as you gave her presence ring and name
I know you love me forever
more as you're a man of your word
hold me for the ocean waves
drown me they now wrack
our boat for you two as I watch
I break uphold me
Oh how it hurts not to feel you
caressing my existence in person

but I have felt your beautiful loving passionate ways
long time ago my gold lock
and your gold key did laid your bridge
openning heavens portal in me.

and that makes all the
difference today

sigh
~~
To honor you in memory
closing the chasm with a poem
a gold lock to gold key.
Karijinbba Mar 2020
Ask to repost dear Poets
(Memoir excerpt /copy Rights)
*
Belated reponse.

Yes you said just a man not God
and I am a woman not G* but G* you needed a wife I needed a husband but you ran away gave the money to your other woman begging for it all

I been feeling differen4tly about you and can sincearly
say "I fell deeply in love with you" back then and today.

it's not out of time or place.
I stil live and after physical
I will continue to love you
beyound measure time & space
noone is harmed by this
its a benefit in a blessing
your world bathes in plenty
mine in total despair lack
oporyunities halted by undeserved enemy foe

And how was this ever fair
to not use a bank
you had my full legal name!

yet you are more to me
as you've moved on you burnt all
a man who patiently reads my mind near or far leaves
precious memories unlike
your ways saved me.

an amazing human being
you you you
reading this ink's body language
my thoughts are your thoughts

I needed you for my life partner
all my life
you needed me for your everything I was yours for the taking as you did.

you saved romance, your last dance for me.

your relatives for my daughers
to inter marry! I had a dream.
for my true love my all

then you jett off leaving me to die
my good trains rolling by
and still
something smoldering revives from those dreams on fire
ashes captured to form of us
my companion.
my beautiful kids loved you
to be their everything just for you to know
beauty brains heart are still theirs
You are the best father best husband best lover best friend
we could have had many adorable grandkids.

my  i love yous didn't matter to nobody it wasn't natural for me to believe it will matter to you.

Life is like a dream.
~~~~
When your gold key was distanced from my gold lock
left behind, I lost my mind
my speech stunt in deeper silence
and still I called you again.
just to hear you freeze.

Ehat 8n the wirld dud you lose ti know the truth that you were truly loved never betrayed.
You found me I found you again
now we are omnipresent
see me see you as we please
we love each other wholly good like the l9ve of Gid
in sun rays we are touched.

returning so many times to me you loved me so, and for your white lies, fear not I am trustworthy
apeace my soul please keep your HP windows open.

I will always think of you.
Nataly Wd or not.

In seeking I found you beloved
smeared in many a poetry
filled with love an Angel watching over me
"Angels whisper when I walk" when I jog, run crawl bathe rest eat feel pain despair, in joys of new lives birthed you are there

I looked into my whispering whimpering heaven's door this gold lock untouched
my gold key you inside that huge
key hole adjusted to fit
another sand lock.

My Guardian Archangel Uriel sing the sadest of songs Earth and Heaven can hear.

Aries Archangel Uriel is known
as a seraph, cherub, regent of the sun, flame of God,
angel of the divine presence, presider over Tartarus
(hell),
archangel of salvation, and, in later scriptures, identified with Phanuel ("face of God") Uriel is a patron of the arts in me

 The Angel Malahidael
 and the Archangel Ariel rule
 over Aries the sign mine
My angel Malahidael is
 “Angel of Courage.” This angel 
summons the energy of the sun­ 
by imparting a ray of sunlight 
inside each person giving that
­ person courage, stamina 
and hope 
during difficult personal tim­es
Are you feeling this?
 The Guardian Angel for those 
born in April Aries is mine  my Archangel guardian Angel
is Uriel, Ariel. 
She is known as the Goddess of 
nature living in me You may also recognize 
her other title shes

the Lioness of God which is the 
literal translation of her­ name
 Ariel Uriel heals the planets and animals 
of this world is also
 responsible­ for natural elements such as Earth, wind, water,
 and fire.
My guardian Angels role as archangel relates 
to inspiration. 
This could be through prov­iding
 inspiration for humanity in 
order to take better care of ­Earth and all life that calls it home.

perhaps it is because I couldn't tolerate the agony of a new common bubble gum key too big, too small out of time and place
splattering stink in selfish pride
each selfishly demanding untimely tasks suffering my lock
missing your gold key beloved.

pre paid seastone snakes where boys not men on cruel expedition demonizing character
Big Bear video greedy evil agendas.
Hungry yet never selling out
to this thugs for hire detectives
sent to me from your world!
I know now when to fight when not to I just share my inner core

I am not fighting In every war I faced defeat being lineant to my deadly enemy was my demise.

no one else was able to overpower this relentles unrequieted love birthed for you.
frim days of yore
no one tried to simply slowly uncover that love hidden within
I hid for us both!
to discover it's magic  
You were wealthier luckier organized surrounded by family and friends to offer support.
I was on my own!
I didn't want another love
but yours for me alone.

Roads interlinked many a time  
you were seized by another
less grassy needing less wear
O how you aged her wine!

that bone fish seastone beer
had an army to win you over
while I was fighting all alone
in my sand shifting battlefield
how to grab you from your
fortress ceized arenas.

Redeeming Angel mine
Angel Mihr Uriel Acquarious
beloved guardian lover
touch my whispering ink.
RBco eyes beloved.

"I am feeling dfferently about you"
~~~~~~~~~
By:Karijinbba
03/21/2020/
Copy Rights apply. revised
Guardian Angel whispering touching
do not repost..
Karijinbba Mar 2020
What a beautiful way to say it
thank you I love you too the most in this whole wide world
for the many times
you found me everywhere for the many times you reappeared, even on here HP I love you
adore you, and pain to not have grabbed you back then when it mattered to you still
you are a genius to plan your love life chronologicaly a success to not lose no matter the pain or loss life forced my life and love life a chronolical disaster systematically a downhill slippery ***** as if unseen forces did all to prevent changing Earth as you dreamevf8r us to do had you known me better you would have made it easier to get to you earlier before life men and women made more scars
if you suffered she'll shock I suffer PTSD none if this suffering though was a problem to win big your way long before mother's day time changes things you could have thrown a big party for you and me but realize
that I was already bitterly wounded
by kidnapping himan predator men and a Charles Manson advocate hunting me in USA
I couldn't follow our old script since you mentioned being married I felt deeply wounded
I felt the hell of jealousy by bad people since age six and later
by demonic Medeas torturing my new born babies I still hear their screams today my ptsd
the only failure real culprit was
your rush to show me your next woman begging you for it all
I can still feel the knife
of those words digging me numb and mute you beast, I was present inches from you owner of your love and treasures why
in hell or in heaven not just grab me and hold me there forever!
weep with me love me to happily ever after!
If i was worth to you everything it was all only yours too already just for the taking!
I am glad my suffering has changed you can I benefit?
see, feel such change! or your wives do? naturally
maby others in your world  benefit.
you were easy to love a Good attractive handsome in manner and in form intelligent gifted rich
gentleman I didn't pass you on you ran from me
and I had chicks 8n the best to tend to asap
everyone can see all this in you
I was blind folded far away
scripted fighting malice greed of others hunting me in a world filled with unreality no helpers my allies were invisible
how was that ever fair and then you jumped to put the icing on my devastating puzzle
you got me all wrong and blessed me to test my heart
giving me a live in woumb treasure I lost
then you placed a scriped fairytale tale in my hands as you layed hurting in someone else's nursing hands but you didn't forget me neither did I
and please look at me truth is all that's left for my great loss.
yet I take all this world of reality gone wrong and unreality stink to heaven in a treasure chest heart of gold and soul I am deeply sorry to not win your favour my wounds were fresh and shame was deep mute lame

If you see an Artist in me,
I accept your compliment it's beautiful I am just you too artist in many ways identical two hearts of gold beating as one
however strange.
You like myself are a true romantic a poet a true elite above the greatest minds ever read about or met.
Glad my art ink has changed you for the better and others benefit
your words apeace a rock off my chest I wrote for me for you firstly and I welcomed all efforts to aproach me from every angle
I am eternally greatful thank you

I wanted you to know and understand my inner core
unconditionally expecting whatever is given is given to me
not 2hat I want to for all comments you wrote I thank you for your time your popping up to read to follow to
learn what's in my RHO- core

I meant so much to you.
You still a bittersweet blessing 
understanding you too late
my misfortune loving you my
survival paradigm blessing

I was your sand hour glass
time sensitive disaster!
I go lamenting all day long hearing from you
is healing that you enjoy life and breathe helps me breathe too
you remain the love of my life.
I rather share you then lose you
think of me I need you.

Your chronological ink lost me but later found me apeacing me; understanding people
and myself was my winning other key.
I'm reciprocating to your
Scarlett letter A's and so much more.
So be it, let it be its better late than never.
Without you present here my air has been thick, food bitter prayers painfuly unenswered

in my world no person is owned
by anyone dear one.
Someone else you predicted
got to our TwinOaks home.
its all into the Lord's hands now
where else to go in your absence
my dear JPC-RK?
"This is the true loving of the woman who loves you most in the whole wide world."
 
 "I  rather shared you then lose you" I Think of you.

In an eye blink tears fall again
"I am wishfully thinking of you"
for you fall in love also
at
home.
~~~~~~
By:Karijinbba -03/03/2020.
Copy Rights.
You were my Unicorn but in your absence The Lord...

The heaven and the earth shall pass away, but my words shall in no way pass away."I love you.
~~~~
Thank you for loving me and waiting for me so long how no to love you.

— The End —