if I sing you Russian melodies
will you cease your hypnotizing?
Mario, oh, my Mario!
you never wanted a real girl,
did you? you see --
you fell in love with a daydream,
but you know I'm not that smart
can't seem to remember my lines
and now my mask is cracking
-- don't look! you'll see me for
exactly who I am, exactly who I'm not
all the imperfections I hid so carefully
for you are spilling out just like my guts
every time you twist the knife with
another lie, another blunt
you scrambled my brains so sweetly!
picked them apart 'til they were yours
well, darling, did I live up to your fantasy?
did things play out the way you'd hoped?
was your muse perfect or did she drop the ball?
I seem to have lost my grip as of late
but admittedly, I'm the only one laughing
you seem bored, shall I entertain?
my jester hat's a little dusty,
my ******* a little rusty
but I can plaster on a smile and dance for you
if that's what your heart is after
and when you're done, I'll dote on you
quietly; I won't get in your way!
after all, you only like the girls who will behave
maybe if I'd worshipped you blindly,
not fought for control of myself
or let my pride block out the brainwashing
we could be happy together forever
but I'm not as bright as you and my heart
just isn't as pure! why am I in school
when I could be barefoot and pregnant for you?
the only gift I have is between my legs,
isn't that what you said in a fit of jealousy?
oh no! I've done it again! I forgot my lines
can't you see? I need you to guide me
I can't make it on my own!
what is it I'm meant to say? tell me,
do you still love me? (hardly!)
Mario, oh, my Mario!
maybe I'm just not fit for the part
this role is much too difficult, so let me sing
-- yes! let me sing! a ballad just for you
or better yet, start the film again
promise this time I'll remember to play along