Raven: Poems

Raven Aug 2020

You heat me up and make me warm

When you kiss my skin
I love the burn

You light me up as you die down
Not even my tears can make you drown

July/2/2020

Feel You

Raven Jun 2020

Feel You

I can feel the damaged emotions
On the tips of your fingers

I can feel the whispered silence
On the cracks of your lips

I can taste the wasted innocence
On the tip of your tongue

I can feel the gentle heartbreak
On the smoothness of your chest

I can feel the damaged distance
On the edges of your words

You aren't perfect
And you aren't a beautiful poem
But you are what I've fallen for

I want to feel every inch
Of your heartbreak

I want to feel every second
Of your whispered truth

I want to feel
All of the broken
That you hold within

I want to take your broken soul
And hold it all together

I want to feel it on my lips
And on the tips of my fingers

I want to feel it in my heart
And as you run your hand along my body

I want your heart next to mine
Even if it's a disaster

june/17/2020/16yrs

Finally

Raven Apr 2018

Finally

Finally leaving
Finally gone

My time has come
For me to leave

Not forever
For I shall visit

But not for awhile

The time has come for me to go

To go back to my mom
To go back to my brother

Finally leaving
Finally gone

Don't miss me for I shall visit
But instead stay in touch
And don't forget me

I will still need you time to time
Don't cry for my absence
Instead smile for hope of my next visit

I will not disappear
So do not fear
For I shall visit
Every once in awhile

So don't cry
Smile

April/ 15/ 2018/ 14 yrs old

Finally A Home

Raven May 2019

Finally A Home

I have had many houses
But never a home
Until I found you

When I was younger I didn't have a home
In the sense that
My heart was alone

When I was younger I didn't have a home
In the sense that
I couldn't drop the fake smile
Until I was on my own

I didn't have a home
Just a house or two
But then
My heart led itself to you

I no longer feel alone
Because now my heart is yours
And yours mine

I no longer feel alone
Because now I know I can be myself
Even when around you

I no longer feel alone
Because now I live with you
For the time being
And you have made this place feel like a home

So
I'm no longer alone with only a house

For now I have you
And you come with a home

And I know that even when I leave
I won't be alone

May/26/2019/5:30PM

Find myself

Raven May 2019

Find myself

I find myself missing you

I wake up to our memories calling my name
I fall asleep to my forbidden fantasies
Pulling me away

I find myself missing you
Night
And day

But
I'm happy
With who I'm with now
So why does my heart remind me of you
Whenever I take a break
From the smile on my face

May/13/2019

Floating Fleeing Gone

Raven Feb 2022

Floating Fleeing Gone

I lay in bed
And I fade away
Into thoughts
And memories

I lay in bed
As I drown
From within
Hoping that maybe I'll be pulled back
And be free from this reality

Drowning
Falling
Floating
Fleeing
Gone

I float on the maybes
Hoping they become solid

Floating makes me tired
I just want to lay down
On the ground
And rest

I drown in all the things
That fall through
And are no longer true

I drown in all the things
That you did
And that I did to you

I'm falling away
From reality
But I'm not even sure
If I even want to stay

I'm full now
Full of broken promises
And the lies people tell
Too full to take another bite

I'm wishing to be gone
To float away
Up into space
Where I can just be
In peace

Oct/3/2021

Fly

Raven Aug 2018

Fly

Fly with wings of flame
Then maybe
You can withstand hr fiery eyes

Fly with wings of water
Then maybe
You won't drown in the depths of her soul

Fly with wings of earth
Then maybe
You won't be buried by her words

Fly with wings of air
Then maybe
You can glide the distance
To
Her heart

August/5/2018

Follow

Raven Jul 2018

Follow

Follow me
Follow them

Follow this
Follow that

Fall for her
But not for me

Fall for him
But not for me

Round and round the cycle goes
People only liking people
For show

July/10/2018

Forest

Raven Aug 2018

Forest

There's a forest in my soul
The leads to my heart

There is many things in the forest
Most
If not all
Are hidden

To reach my heart you must make it through

You must make it past
The forgetting paths
They often forget where they are supposed to go

You must make it past
The clingy wolfs
Sometimes they forget how far
Is too far

You must make it past
The overthinking bears
For they'll pin you down in a death like grip
But then stay there
For they start to overthink

Last
But not least

You must make it across
Lust lake
For sometimes
Depending on the way I act
It can drown you
In temptation

August/6/2018

Forgotten

Raven Jun 2018

Forgotten

Forgotten wishes
When we turn
Four

Forgotten dreams
When we turn
Six

Forgotten friendships
When we turn
Eight

Forgotten imagination
When we turn
Ten

Forgotten smiles
When we turn
Twelve

Forgotten crushes
When we turn
Fourteen

Forgotten love
When we turn
Sixteen

Forgotten stories
When we turn
Eighteen

Forgotten family
When we turn
Twenty

We forget
And we remember

Every new memory comes at a cost
For every memory gained
A memory is lost

Free Me

Raven Feb 2019

Free Me

Let me go
Set me free

I'm tired
Of me
Of others
Of everything

I'm tired of being woken up by yelling
It's damaging my soul
And taking away my sanity

I'm tired of not getting any trust
It makes me feel as if all I do is wrong
And it's making me restrain all that is me

I'm tired of craving touch
All it ever does is remind me of the thing's he's done
And it's stealing my innocence over
And over
Again
And again
Day in and day out

Let me be
Set me free
Stop everything from continuing to
Damage me

Feb/24/2019

Glad You're Mine

Raven Apr 2018

Glad You're Mine

I'm glad you're mine
You can make me happy and make me smile no matter how I feel

I love you more than I can explain
And I can't get you off my mind

I wish I could always hold you in my arms and never have to let you go

You make me happier than anyone I know
And that I knew

Your smile is like the moon to me
It makes my dark nights have at least a bit of light

I hope I can call you my little bear forever and always

January/ 2018/ 14 yrs old

Goodnight and Sorry

Raven Apr 2018

Goodnight and Sorry

Goodnight he whispers as he fades away

Goodnight she whispers as she falls down and hits the ground

Goodnight they whisper as they fade together

Sorry he whispered the day before
Sorry for leaving
Sorry for hurting you

Sorry she whispered the day before as she fell to her knees
Sorry for being a burden
Sorry for hurting

Sorry they whispered the day before
Sorry to the people who had to put up with us
Sorry to our foster parents who found us too much
Sorry to the orphanage for coming back

Sorry and goodnight they all whispered at the same time in different towns as they all fell to the ground.

#sad #suicide

Harm

Raven May 2018

Harm

I harm my body

I can still hear the sound of my fist hitting metal
And I still remember the fleeting way I would look around making sure no one saw

I can still smell the sweetness of my blood as it drips
And feel my skin as it splits in two

I harm my self in many ways
Some that I can't even explain

May/ 25/ 8:23PM/ 2018/ 14 years old

Hate Me?

Raven Apr 2018

Hate Me?

Where did I go wrong?
What did I do to make most people hate me?

Because no matter what I do I can't hate them too
I just hope that one day they say they were wrong

January/ 22/ 2018/ 14 yrs old

Hate That I'm Tired

Raven Apr 2018

Hate That I'm Tired

I hate how much I weigh

I hate the way I look

I hate the way I feel sick after I eat but still give into the hunger anyway

I hate how I push people away

I hate how no one sees me worth enough for them to stay

I hate how I always give people a million reasons to walk away

I hate my scars

I hate that I always fake a smile

I hate that I always fake a laugh

I hate how easily everyone walks away

I hate my past

I hate change

I hate pretending I don't hate things

I hate how you ignore my tears

I hate how you discard my fears

I hate how you always forget important things

I hate how you pretend nothing happened

I hate overthinking

I hate a lot of things but most of all I hate myself
And I'm tired of being this way

I'm tired of crying

I'm tired of trying

I'm tired of lying

I'm tired of being tired

I'm tired of your lies

I'm tired of hearing goodbye

I'm tired of feeling worthless

I'm tired of feeling pathetic

I'm tired of feeling unwanted

I'm tired of not being strong enough

I'm tired of hating that I'm tired

Feb/ 7/ 2018/ 8:37 PM/ 14 yrs old

He Writes Poetry

Raven Jun 2018

He Writes Poetry

He writes poetry
But no one knows

He writes poetry
He writes about love
And loss

He writes about smiles
And frowns

He writes about sorrow
And forgotten towns

He writes about how lost he gets
Caught up in his own mind

He writes poetry to
And about others

But no one knows

Know one knows the depth of his soul
Because they all choose to see the exterior
And that exterior screams

Preppy
And preppy
Don't have souls

Or so they thought
Until the day he was consumed
By his own poetry

His Eyes

Raven Apr 2018

His Eyes

His eyes flicker with fear when you reach a hand out
But you don't notice

His eyes flicker with worry when you hang with other guys
But you don't notice

His eyes show love when you smile his way
But you don't notice

His eyes are peaceful when you hug him
But they are also showing a paralyzing fear
You still don't notice though

You make him feel peaceful when no one else does and your laugh erases his fears
But you don't notice

His stormy grey eyes and gentle hugs make you feel wanted and worth something
But this isn't a love story

For her demons consumed her one night and now shes gone
And he never noticed her pain for she was a master of deception

Jan/ 11/ 2018/ 10:27 PM/ 14 yrs old

Hold Me

Raven Jul 2018

Hold Me

Hold me close
Hold me near

Don't hold me like you wanna touch me
Hold me like you wanna love me

Wrap your arms around my waist
Don't lead them any other place

Pull me close
Keep me safe

For your arms around me
Brings me peace

I
Think
I
Love
You

June/24/2018

Hold Me Close

Raven Jul 2018

Hold Me Close

Hold me close
Keep me safe

Wrap your arms around my shoulders
Wrap your arms around my waist

Hold my hand
Pull me close

Make silly jokes
And make me smile

For when I smile for you
My smile is true
And when I see your smile on your face
All my fears and doubts
Are erased

July/9/2018

Hurt

Raven Aug 2018

Hurt

You ended things
Because you couldn't handle a relationship
At lest that's what you said

But really
It was because
You didn't love me

So stop with the lies
And tell me the truth

Because
I no longer
Want to hurt

July/2018

Hurt Me, But I'll Fight

Raven Feb 2019

Hurt Me, But I'll Fight

I love you
Yeah
I said it
And I know I've said it before
But I no longer say it to you
Because
You aren't sure you want to be more than a thing
Ever
So I'll just keep it in my head

Everytime I text you I feel my heart constrict
I love you
And loving you hurts me

But
I'm going to fight
For you
And I'm not giving up
Not until you find someone else

I wanna see every smile that crosses your face
I wanna hear every laugh that passes your lips
I wanna help with every tear
Every sad thought that passes your way

I want to make you happy
But I'm not sure I'll be the one to do that

But I won't give up
Not yet

You set me free but at the same time I hold back

Every time I see you smile I wanna say I love you
Everytime I make you laugh I wanna say I love you
Everytime you frown I wanna say I love you
Everytime I look into your eyes that hold all the emotions I wanna understand
I wanna whisper I love you

But I can't say it out loud
So I'll say it silently

I'll say it to myself before I fall asleep
I'll say it to myself when I wake up
I'll say it to myself on those lonely nights when I stare up at the moon
Wishing you could hear me
And maybe say it back

But for now
I'll wait

You hurt me
But I love you
So I'll fight

Febuary/11/8:40PM/2019

#love #heartbreak #sadness #hurt #longing #hope

I Am

Raven Apr 2018

I Am

I am the shadow you fear in the darkest corner of your dreams
Yet I am also the beauty of the haunted mysteries that draw you near

I am darkness
And I am light

I am a monster
And I am an angel

I am the memories you wish to erase
But I am also the ones you wish to keep

I am love
And I am hate

I am truth
And I am lies

I am you
But I am still me

I am your conscious

April/ 13/ 2018/ 9:05PM/ 14 yrs old

If I Was A Guy

Raven Jun 2018

If I Was A Guy

If I was a guy would people like me the same?
Hate me the same?

Would they treat me the same?
Or would they like me more?

Would they treat me the same?
Or would they hate me more?

If I was a guy would I be as lost?
Would I be as broken?
Would my past no longer be the past that it is?

If I was a guy would my dad have ever touched me?

If I was a guy would I still be just as used?
Just as worthless?
Just as lonely?

Or would I have somebody to hold?
Would I have somebody to call my own?

If I was a guy
Would I still be me?
Or have an entirely different reality

I'm Okay

Raven Apr 2018

I'm Okay

People will walk up to me and ask
Are you okay?
In reply I'll always either say "ya I'm fine" or "I'm alright"
Then I plaster on a fake smile
But they think it's real o they walk away satisfied even though inside I'm dying

Now people who I know will walk up and say "you look tired" and in reply I'll say "ya, I don't sleep very much" then they'll go silent and ignore anything else I say or they'll say "same" and walk away
Little do they know that it's because my demons chase all my dreams away

Now the few people that I can call friends don't really ever ask me how I am for they no longer want to hear the answer
Little do they know that the light is quickly fading from my eyes

I no longer have any friends
So no one asks me how I am
I also no longer have to pretend
Little do they know that tonight I'll say goodbye

Jan/ 10/ 2018/ 10:13 AM/ 14 yrs old

I Sing

Raven Apr 2018

I Sing

I sing a lonely song
I sing it for the people who feel they have no one that cares
I sing it for the people with no place to call home
I sing it to the people who are surrounded but with no love

I sing an angry song
I sing it to all the people left to cry
I sing it to the people who got left with no warning or goodbye
I sing it for the betrayed
And I sing it to the played

I sing a sad song
I sing it to the people who have lost all hope
I sing it to the people who have cried more then a thousand tears
I sing it to the people with no will left to give
I sing it to the heartbroken
And I sing it to the shattered

I sing a happy song
I sing it to the people with no pain left to feel
I sing it to the people who have been given a break
I sing it to the innocent to advise them not to look deep

I sing a song about love
I sing it to the people who have someone to hold
I sing it for the people who have someone to call their own
I sing it for the careless
And i sing it for the careful
I sing it for the captivated
And for those who only seek

I sing one last desperate song
I sing it for those who want to give up
I sing it to those who feel like they've had enough
I sing it to those who feel worthless and lost
And most of all I song it to those who can no longer think of a because

January/ 7/ 2018/ 12:22PM/ 14 yrs old

Is This Okay?

Raven Feb 2022

Is This Okay?

"Hello" I say to you
(Hello) You reply

"How are you?"
(Drowning)

"What are you doing?"
(Fading away)

(Hello) You say
"Hello" I reply

(How are you?)
"I'm fine"

(What are you doing)
"Listening to music"

"Hello" I say to you
(Hello) You reply

"What makes you want to die?"
(The constant people who use me)

"What makes you want to live?"
(John and his love)

(Hello) You say
"Hello" I reply

(What make you want to die?)
"Lots I guess"

(What makes you want to live?)
"My stuffies"

"Hello" I say to you
(Hello) You reply

"How do you feel right now"
(I want to go away. Forever)

"What do you want?"
(Actual consistent love)

(Hello) You say
"Hello" I reply

(How do you feel right now?)
"I'm okay. Listening to music"

(What do you want?)
"Cuddles"

(Don't lie to me)
"I'm not"

(What do you want?)
"Love?"

(No)
"Okay"

(So?)
"I want to be free"

(I want to die please)
"I want to die please"

As you may see
They are both me
But the difference is
One is who you see

Nov/7/2021

#suicide #freestyle

I Wait

Raven Apr 2018

I Wait

Every day I wait

I wait for the day that I'll hear your voice

I wait for the day I'll be able to take in your every feature

I wait for the day I'll be in your arms and you in mine

I wait for the day I can officially declare you real

I wait for the day I can tell you I love you with more than just a thought

Every day I wait
And every night I cry

I wait for the day I don't have to wait any longer

I wrote this about a short story that I did for English.

January/ 7/ 11:48PM/ 14 yrs old

I Want You

Raven Aug 2018

I Want You

I want you to hold my hand
And along with it
Help hold my fears

I want you to hold me close
And keep me safe

I want you to kiss me
Like the minute I go
You'll miss me

I want you to make me smile
And make me laugh
Like I never have before

I want you to let me hold your hand
And help hold your fears

I want you to let me hold you close
And keep you safe

I want you to let me kiss you
Like the second you go I'll miss you

I want you to let me make you smile
And make you laugh
Like no one ever could
And no one else ever will

I want my heart to be yours
And yours to be mine
But maybe it's too soon

So I'll wait in the shadows of your smiles
And hope one day you fall for me
The way I have fallen for you

July/9/2018

Jokes

Raven May 2018

Jokes

I make jokes

I don't make normal jokes though

The jokes I make are self deprecating

I call them jokes
But in reality they are how I really feel
They are my secret truth
The truth I have hidden away

You joke and say you are trash
I disagree then I say I am recycling
You don't get it
You ask me to explain
I say
"I am recycling because I get re-used"
You laugh and say good one
I laugh but on the inside
I know it's not really a joke

May/24/2:49PM/2018/14 years old

Keara

Raven Apr 2018

Keara

Green eyes

Fair skin

Dark hair

Not chubby
Not thin

Dark humor

Dark clothes

Black room

Red flaws

This is my imagination

April/ 7/ 2018/ 9:21 PM/ 14 yrs old

Key

Raven Mar 2019

Key

Theres a key to a room in a place I call home
Or a more fitting name
House

There's a key to a room
And that room is mine

I do not live alone
I am not old enough
I live with my parents
And my brother
And a pet
Although
I wish to have two

So why is there a key to your room?

Well because
You see

Once upon a time ago
My own father
Stole my soul

March/4/2019

Leave

Raven Sep 2018

Leave

You tell me
You won't ever leave

But that's what everyone else said too
But then I ended up losing them
The way I don't ever wanna lose you

But hey if I do lose you
I'll be okay
Or at least that's what I'll tell myself
Before I fade away

So hey
You tell me you won't ever leave me
And you ask me to never leave you

But one day
I'll be afraid
Your drifting away

So I'll say goodbye
Before you can
Then I'll cry
Because of me
And not because of you

Because
If it's my fault
It'll hurt less

But if it's your fault
I'll wanna put you through a test

What test?
Well
Let's just say

If you leave I'm gonna test
How long can you last?
How long can you withstand my words?
How long until you falter under the words I speak?
How long until you can't stand me repeating the lies you said?
How long until you break?

Because I know just the right things to say
To make you fade away
The way you made me

So please don't leave me
Cause I don't wanna hurt you
But if you do
That's what I'll have to do

September/23/2018

Leave Me Please

Raven Feb 2019

Leave Me Please

Leave my heart
You're tearing it apart
And you sit right in the middle
Taking down the walls
One for every two I build

Leave my thoughts
Because you occupy every one
And if you stay I'm gonna hurt someone
But I think I already have

Leave me please
Because I can't bear my feelings
But even if you do I might not be able to

I don't want you to go
But you hurt me

I don't want you to go
But you use me

I don't want you to go
But this is unhealthy

So as much as I love you

Please just leave me

And don't return
When you miss me

Left

Raven May 2018

Left

You have now left me

As I sit here fighting away more tears
I wonder
Do you remember all the things I wrote about you?
Do you remember the poem called You that I wrote?

You probably don't

Even though you left me today it feels like it was forever ago
For you seem so far away from me

Did you think about the fact that you come over early every thursday so you can get to youth?
Wether I'm coming or not?

You probably didn't

Now every time you come over
I will retreat
I will retreat to my bedroom
To the bathroom
Or out the door
So I can find somewhere quite to cry

Because your smile gave me life
Your gaze gave me butterflies

You are utterly beautiful in my eyes
But you don't see yourself that way

So you break
And then you leave me
Because 'you can't handle a relationship'
I understand
But my heart still shattered when I read those words

Tears instantly swelled my eyes and started to pour
Just like rain on a lonely night

Now tonight as I go lay in my bed
I will stare out my window
At the wall
Or the roof

Remembering your smile
Remembering your laugh
Remembering how safe I felt next to you
Pressed into you
And just near you

I will lay there as tears streak my cheeks
As I remember the way my heart would beat just at the sight of you
As I remember the way my heart would break when I saw the smile falter from your face

For I didn't want you to feel broken like me
Because you deserve to be happy

You are beautiful to me
And you always will be

Now as I sit here my thoughts will not leave you

If anyone asks for me to be theirs I will probably say no
And I probably will for many years

But if I say yes I will not truly love them
For I will forever remember when you were my puppy
And I was your kitten

May/ 25/ 8:45PM/ 2018/ 14 years old

Leo

Raven Nov 2018

Leo

Confused
That is what I am
About everything
That has to do with you

Because I know
You will never want me
Because I'm not your type
Nor am I a typical girl

But even so
I have to say this
Because if I don't
I'll end up telling you everything

Your smile is like a cold
It's contagious if you get too close
But unlike a cold
It draws you in

Your voice is like the sun
It fills me with warmth
But the minute it's gone
I become cold again

You hugged me one time
And it was like nothing before
Every bad feeling just flew out the door
That's when I knew I loved you
But I cant say a thing

So
I will observe you in painful silence
And cherish every word
Every gesture
Every glance
Every feeling
Hoping one day
It won't just be me
Feeling this way
But I know that's just a stupid fantasy

So every night
And every morning
I'll stay in silence
And put on a mask of false hope
And cover my mouth with restraining lies
Until one day I falter

Until that day I will lay awake
Every night
Thinking of you
Because you occupy my every thought
And keep me awake with thoughts of being called yours
And
Every morning
I'll wake up tired
But with hope that
Maybe I'll see you today
Maybe
Just maybe

Life

Raven Apr 2018

Life

Not okay
Not alright

Life decides to keep me this way

It decides to make me feel worthless
Lost
Like I don’t mean a thing

But thats okay

One day i'll sleep and I won’t wake up again

Sleep will be my last goodbye.

Linger

Raven Sep 2020

Linger

You linger there
In the back of my mind
Like a ghost
Held in by time

You linger there
Trying to push your way forward
Urging me to think
About
YOU

You linger there
But I don't want you to

For everytime I let you forward
I start to smell your scent

For everytime I let you forward
I start to feel your presence

For everytime I let you forward
I'm rendered
Silent
Unmoveable

For everytime I let you froward
You haunt me

You linger there
Taunting me
Haunting the darkest corners of
Me

Little

Raven Apr 2018

Little

When I was little
I didn't really have friends

When I was little
I never had much fun
For I was depressed by six

When I was little
I didn't wish for ponies or dresses
I wished for protection or some way to escape

When I was little
I didn't fantasize about magical lands and unicorns
I fantasized about safe nights and days free of yelling

When I was little I wasn't scared of the monsters under my bed
For they were my friends
I was scared of the monster who I called dad

When I was little I never got homesick
I got sick of home

When I was little
I had a childhood
But not for long

April/ 22/ 2018/ 1:32PM/ 14 yrs old

Longing (wrote when I was 12)

Raven Apr 2018

Longing (wrote when I was 12)

The feel of his kiss
The taste of his lips against mine was amazing

I want his lips on mine again
I want to be held in his arms again
I want to be his
I want to be with him all the time
Have him be called mine

Because when I'm with him I feel safe
And I like that we are going at a steady pace
Instead of acting like we are in a race against the world

Long story short this is about the second person I have truly loved. We are friends now but nothing more. We didn't last very long when we were.

#love

Look At Me

Raven Jan 2019

Look At Me

Look at me
No
That's not what I mean
I mean really
Look at me and see that when you look me in the eye
All there is are forbidden tears
Look at me without long sleeves
Then maybe you'll see the harm I do
See
Don't just look

Because you seem to think I'm fine
And you ignore all the pathetic lies
You ignore me because

"I'm fine :)"

But what does I'm fine really mean?
It means I'm begging someone to care
I'm begging for love
But I can't say that
I can't show that
Because if I do

"All you want is attention"

But no
I want genuine
I'm sick of fake
I'm sick of people seeing how bad my arms now are
And just saying

"I'm sorry"

Like that helps
But it doesn't
Because I'm sick of pity

All I want is someone to hold me
Without saying a word

Looking Down

Raven Apr 2018

Looking Down

She sits up high and looks at everything yet to come

He sits down low and looks up at his past

She sees him
And he sees her

He is her future
But she is his past

Jan/ 11/ 2018/ 10:38 PM/ 14 yrs old

Lost You

Raven Apr 2018

Lost You

I thought that I would lose myself before I lost you
But I was wrong

One night I accidentally pushed you too far and your demons claimed you
They took your soul and they took your heart and they damaged you one last night

I thought that I would lose myself before I lost you
But I was wrong

For you are now gone and I have lost a part of me along with you

March/ 12/ 2018/ 14 yrs old................................ This is about one of my ex's who committed suicide ;-;

Love

Raven Apr 2018

Love

Love is an adventure

Some people tread lightly on the adventure

Others are reckless

Whether you are careful or not though love can still break you

Some say love is peaceful

Some can't wait to feel it
But let me tell you
Once you realize love is ruthless and doesn't hesitate to break you
You will become more careful no matter how careless you used to be

January/ 2018/ 14 years old

Loved It

Raven Aug 2021

Loved It

I love the time I spend with you
It makes me want to do better
And it makes me want to try
And do things on my own
With you watching
And guiding

I loved cuddling under the bridge
Watching as it rained
And dripped a bit on us

I loved kissing you that first time
It made my heart melt
And made me feel warm inside

I loved when you played with my hair
You did it with such care
When I never even asked you

I love when you stare at me
It makes me feel shy
And a little pretty

I love when you rub my arm
And my back
It makes me feel comfortable
And safe in your arms

I love laughing with you
It makes me feel free
And mostly at ease

I love making you smile
It makes my heart warm
And makes me feel worth it

I love your hair with all its floof
Its cute when it gets in the way
And I have to move it to kiss
All the sadness away

I love the way you make me feel
As if maybe I can keep going
And finally be real with someone
Without having to worry

I love when I get to hold you close
It makes me feel wanted
And like you're okay with me wanting you

I love when you laugh
At all the small things I do
Even when I have to just wonder why

I love seeing the way you feel
When I look you in the eye
Because I know it's not bad
And I don't have to worry

I love all the smiles you bring to my face
It takes only a small amount of effort
Of just being you

June/1/2021

Lurking Underneath

Raven Apr 2018

Lurking Underneath

Everyone always says
"See the forest for the trees."
But no one ever says
"But be careful of what might be lurking underneath."

So the monsters have gone unnoticed and have started to attack by entering our minds and making us lack any feeling of our own

Deep down we know
But we still venture where we shouldn't go

November/ 18/ 2017/ 13 yrs old

Mason

Raven Apr 2018

Mason

Their smile could light up a room

Their laugh can drown out my thoughts

Their eyes see me for who I am not who I pretend to be

Their hands are as soft as silk

The way they walk
The way they talk
The way they look at me
The way they act has me entranced

But I shouldn't love them because they are taken

January/ 19/ 2018/ 14 yrs old

Mason♥️

Raven Apr 2018

Mason♥️

The time I had with you was the best I've had in awhile

You made me smile
Like no one else could

You made me laugh
Like no one else could

But soon it will be time for me to go
Time for us to part

I love you
More than anyone before

But soon it's time for us to part
Because long distance will tear us apart

It will ruin your heart
Because I'm not faithful in long distance

Because I will cheat
Not once
Not twice
But more than you would want to count

So it's time for us to part soon
Because long distance is too hard
And I don't want to shatter your heart

So I love you
And soon this will be goodbye

I am moving soon so this is a poem to the person I am currently dating.

Maybe

Raven Apr 2018

Maybe

Maybe if I write I can escape this reality

Maybe if I sing I can drown out the comments

Maybe if I draw I won't want to cut

Maybe if I listen to music I can drown out my thoughts

Maybe if I make you mad at me I don't have to be mad at myself

Maybe if I read I can escape this world

Maybe if you touch me you can replace some bad memories

Maybe if you hug me I'll fall apart

Maybe if you love me I'll push you away

Maybe if you leave me I'll be right

Maybe if we fight I'll become silent

Maybe if I'm crowded I'll slowly shrink away

Maybe if I crawl into a small place he can't get me

Maybe if you kiss me I'll kiss you back

Maybe if you avoid me my love will finally go away

Maybe if you keep talking I don't have to listen to my thoughts

Maybe if its cold I can freeze my emotions

Maybe if it's cold my emotions will run free

Maybe in a year I'll have cried a thousand tears

Maybe one day my demons will let my soul rest

Maybe one day the world will stop giving me tests

Maybe one day I will smile again

Maybe one day my laugh will ring loudly

Maybe one day I'll sing a song about joy

Maybe one day my memories won't haunt me

Maybe one day I'll sing one last song

Maybe one day I'll say a final goodbye

Maybe one day I'll write my last words

Maybe one day my cries will be heard

Maybe one day I'll fade away

January/ 6/ 2018/ 10:42PM/ 14 years old

Maybe Again

Raven Apr 2018

Maybe Again

Maybe if you love me I'll love you

Maybe if I disappear I will be forgotten

Maybe if I'm clingy you will leave

Maybe if it's dark you won't have to see me cry

Maybe if I break your heart you'll shatter mine

Maybe if it's loud I can finally scream

Maybe if you hold me I'll hold you

Maybe when I smile you'll think it's real

Maybe when I laugh it won't sound fake

Maybe when I cry my face will feel dry

Maybe in the morning my wrist'll be stained red

Maybe one day I'll actually stay in bed

Maybe one day I'll find a way

Maybe one day there will no longer be a tomorrow

Maybe one day won't end in sorrow

Maybe one day I won't miss you at night

Maybe one day I won't wake up in tears

Maybe one day I'll sleep my life away

Maybe one day I'll die in a peaceful way

Maybe one day I'll only be a memory

Maybe one day I'll be able to say I'm okay

Maybe one day I'll marry my past

Maybe one day I'll accept my reality

Maybe one day I'll wear colour again

Maybe one day I won't feel so numb

Maybe one day when I cut I'll feel the pain

Maybe one day I'll stop pushing people away

Maybe one day I'll let someone stay

Maybe one day I won't have to lie

Maybe one day I'll write one last poem

Maybe one day I'll face my fears

Maybe one day your smile will no longer dry my tears

Maybe one day you'll leave me behind

Maybe one day I'll be left to cry

Maybe one day I'll have heard a thousand goodbyes

Maybe one day I'll be able to look into your eyes

Maybe one day you'll stop feeding them lies

Maybe one day I'll hear your bark again

Maybe one day I'll stop missing you

Maybe one day I'll stop crying over you

Maybe one day you'll stop loving me

Maybe one day I won't miss you so much

Maybe one day I'll stop collecting

Maybe one day I'll only wear one

Maybe one day you'll leave me alone

Maybe one day I'll stop trying

Maybe one day I won't be able to cry

Maybe one day I'll burn them away

Maybe one day nothing will be the same

Maybe one day I'll be more careful

Maybe one day my memories of you will go away

Maybe one day there will no longer be a today

Maybe one day I'll officially declare you my forever and always

Maybe one day music won't be my only escape

Maybe one day I'll no longer want to die

Maybe one day you'll hold my tears at bay

Maybe one day I'll be led astray

January/ 29/ 2018/ 11:41PM/ 14 yrs old