Here I go again on this merry-go-round
Never knowing when it's going to stop
I feel like a spinning top
I used to find it so fun and exciting
But after falling off more than a few times it's not so inviting
It left me feeling dizzy and sick even though it ended so quick

My mind in one place and my heart in another
How do I let this go when I still wonder
About you, about us, and where it all went wrong

Could it be fixed?
Am I wrong to still think like this?

I'm holding onto the good memories and blocking out the bad
You have a piece of my heart that I'll never get back

How can I hate you, but still love you?
I can't construe these emotions
I feel like I'm constantly battling myself in this commotion

I keep thinking you'll have a breakthrough
That we'll redo and start new
If only you knew how much I loved you

I love you I really do, but sometimes it's just too hard
And I feel we won't make it through

You've said and done things that have hurt me to the core
You ignore my feelings because you've heard it all before

It seems we fell into a routine
Makeups and breakups
We're always right in between
This is getting so obscene

Tired of fighting over who's right or wrong
Different opinions that are too strong
Why can't we just get along?

I love you I really do, but sometimes it's just too hard
And I feel we won't make it through

Should I leave or should I stay?
This question is on my mind everyday

The fear of losing everything just to restart really breaks my heart
Why did we build this is we were just going to fall apart?

I keep thinking you'll say let's try to get through this
Pull me in with a kiss and say I'm not someone you'd ever want to miss
But I get nothing, you're emotionless

What hurts the most is knowing you're okay while I'm left feeling gray
Two and a half years we threw away

Should I leave or should I stay?
I think it's time to walk away

Sleep eludes me yet again
My worries and mistakes are keeping me awake
All I do is ache anymore
For god sakes, give me a break

I feel like I have a ton of bricks on my shoulders
They weigh me down and leave me feeling much older

I wish things could come easily to me
Then I could finally be free,
Free from this misery that I carry daily

These words are trite, but there the only ones I know
I need to swallow my sorrows in order to grow
It’s time to move on, time to let go

I can’t seem to move on no matter how hard I try

I just don’t want this to be goodbye

My heart feels bruised

I’m left broken and confused

I don’t know what to do

Memories run through my head

I can still remember everything you said

You left me feeling misled

I keep pouring my heart out to you

Thinking we’ll start new

But it doesn’t matter to you

There’s nothing more I can do

I can’t wait on you anymore

All you do is ignore

Leaving my heart so sore

So therefore I’m closing the door

These bad memories come and go
That happened long ago

But the pain remains the same
I can still feel the shame

Dad comes home and we all flee from the scene
Always following his same old routine

The fighting and yelling is all we can hear
Locked away and filled with fear

We’re crying out for help to get out of here
But it’s not too long before another bruise appears

We suffered for years and cried so many tears
So much hate has filled our ears

We taught ourselves from right and wrong
We learned from each others mistakes
With no guidance from our parents the decisions were ours to make

Dad got away and left us again
But mom gave in and let him back in

I don’t know if that’s something I can let go
Even though it happened long ago