You’re like Chinese food

for my ****

dropped off in a

slightly soggy box

hidden wrapped

in brown paper

like you’re ashamed

***** secret fortune cookie

cracking up at the bottom

slurping you already

I pay the man

Her small round face stares back at her
Blinking blue eyes in the bright blue light and
She looks around knowing it’s wrong but not daring to ask why
While chubby pale fingers type in the line
“Chat rooms for kids”

She know that she is not yet old enough to be here
She’s only nine but she checks the box to assure the website that, yes,
She is 18 years old or above and, yes,
She understands that there is adult content present inside of this room and, yes,
Child **** is not permitted beyond this door.

But to a nine year old these letters on the page are meaningless.
She doesn’t know what adult content is or even how to
Pronounce the word ******* precisely.
All she knows is that in a matter of clicks
She will mean something.
She will mean something, and she will have worth.
She will be loved and cared for and praised and called a
Good girl, a
Babygirl, a
Kitten, a
Beautiful
Stunning
Delicious looking darling.

She learns new vocabulary terms but instead of words like
C-C-Contrast or
T-T-Typical or
D-D-Difficult
She begins to ingrain in her brain new and exciting words like
C-C-**** or
T-T-**** or
D-D-****.
She even learns how to use these fancy adult-y adultery words in a sentence like
“How big is your C-C-****?” and
“I don’t have T-T-**** yet” and
“I want to touch your D-D-****”.
And with every letter her tiny hands typed out, more and more men
Flocked to her DMs, ready to give her all the love she could ever need if only
In exchange for a couple of things…
Will you do a dance for me?
Will you say this sentence for me?
Why don’t you take your shirt off for me?
Show me what such a big girl can do with that P-P-*****.

And she continues to learn new things such as that
ASL means age, ***, location and that anything above 7 inches is
A good and impressive and “wow” thing and that
If she does what these men on the screen ask her to then
She will make them happy, which makes her happy, which means that she has done good.
And she learns that certain ways she moves makes them happier
And certain poses she can do allows them to show her their magic trick.
She doesn’t know how the magic trick works but it doesn’t matter because
When they perform their magic trick they thank her
And praise her and say nice things to her and
That’s all she really wanted.

She found a home in that cream colored background of
Www . chatavenue . com and she knew that even when the world
Was against her sweet, innocent nine year old self that she could
Turn to that blinking cursor and type a few letters and be able to
Feel loved.
And that was all she really wanted.

**** the sun
**** the clover
**** the grass
**** the blue skies
**** the fluffy clouds
**** the trees
**** my shadow
**** this pen
**** the prairie grasses
**** the oxygen
**** the fungus eating that tree
**** the singing birds
**** the humid air
**** the peaceful afternoon
**** that ever present drone
**** the space between two objects
**** the white butterfly flying randomly
**** the birds mating
**** my finger prints
**** my fingernails
**** consciousness behind my eyelids
**** the wine in my eyes
**** bees
**** ants
**** flowers
**** the humid afternoon breeze
**** the sign that says private property keep out
**** the mating calls
**** the chirping birds
**** good health
**** bad breath
**** instant gratification
**** ****
**** black/white spotted cats
**** the tree shadows
**** the swaying grasses
**** the yellow garden hose
**** the chaquita banana box
**** getting lucky
**** guys walking their bulldogs
**** the thin grasses
**** the sun on my back and neck
**** the indoors
**** the outdoors

The truck pulled up at the crack of dawn
On a Sunday morn in June,
I could hear the men unloading from
The darkness of my room,
‘What a strange time to deliver,’ I thought,
As I rose, pulled on my socks,
For there on the porch outside I found
They’d left a ******* box.

There wasn’t a mark on this gleaming box
But the scrawl of my own address,
Nothing to say who it was from
Just a silent emptiness,
I left it there til the sun came up
Then I pulled it through the door,
And there in a tiny script was writ
The legend, ‘from Zhongguo’.

Why would the Chinese send a box,
I hadn’t been there for years,
Maybe the Tong I’d tangled with
Back then, for black was a curse.
I looked for a way to open it
But there wasn’t a flap or seam,
It wasn’t tin and it wasn’t steel
But a substance in-between.

I dragged it out in the garden then,
Outside of the door, at back,
And thought that I would figure it out,
Then the box began to crack.
It heated up in the morning sun
And began to peel away,
Opening up the inside to
Be seen by the light of day.

And there inside was a giant egg,
The biggest I’d ever seen,
All sorts of curious markings on
The shell, in Mandarin.
I went inside and I locked the door
And I sat myself to think,
Why would they send a giant egg?
My mind was on the blink!

It only took a couple of hours
In the sun, that day in June,
And the shell began to break apart,
To hatch in the afternoon,
And a thing crawled out of that empty shell
That I never thought I’d see,
A tiny Chinese Dragon hatched
Came out, was suddenly free!

I couldn’t believe how fast it grew
As it fluttered out its wings,
It ate the cat and my bowler hat
And a host of other things,
Then it wandered down to the goldfish pool
Slid in, and began to swim,
There isn’t a single goldfish left
And the pool is sizzling.

Its head comes up and it gives a roar
And it sets the reeds on fire,
The flame is almost ten feet long
And my future’s looking dire.
Will someone get in touch with the zoo
They can have the beast for free,
Oh no! It’s wandering up the path,
No doubt, it’s looking for me!

David Lewis Paget

Zhongguo – ****. Jong gwar – China

I apologize for seeming so weird

Its just that fate has always showed me exactly I feared

If you thought that I enjoyed or reveled in the oddities

You’d be wrong, I’ve always envied the wannabees

Its the price I pay for being aware

I never cared to know this much about the truth, I deem it unfair

I feel like I’ve always wanted love

But as much as I’ve desired its not something I was made of

My life has been nothing on this side of typical

Growin up I felt my beliefs to be unsinkable

Then she broke all my understanding of reality

Mom showed me life was anything you wanted it to be

And I don’t know if that was for good or bad

I started pushing the envelope just to see what I really had

Could you love me if I really did this?

Probably but I would never tell you, keeping secrets balled inside my fists

They would only explode when they hit

But no one ever saw, I was my only friend when I had to get through the hell of it

Years have passed I may be getting over it

But I still feel as empty as the day I fell inside this ****

If my message couldn’t be anymore clear

I feel like its been a mistake since the day I got here

And I can’t emphasize how much I die every time I go to a lifeless job that leaves us more blind

I see the soulless look inside your eyes and I wonder if you could pinpoint which moment in your life you died

I’m not saying that I’m perfect in any shape or form

I often wish God wouldn’t have wasted this life on someone so **** to under preform

I don’t know what it is I’m living for

The jist of what I’m meaning is there has to be so much more

We have to believe that what we do matters

Because if it had no meaning we’d just be a bunch of unpaid actors

Going through the day to day, trying to grab as much pleasure that comes your way

And I feel sorry for those who think that’s what its about

Who feel that nothing happens when the light inside you goes out

And once again, I don’t pretend to know it all

But I know this much, there’s a lot of undiscovered life inside of ya’ll.

Teach compassion, kindness, and generosity not fear, greed and hate... depression is a mental disorder not a weakness, some are born **** to it and others have it forced upon them.  Teach that a good life is what love you leave behind and not how much **** you accumulated to be sold in a garge sell 10 minutes after you're buried...

1.To make you Cease & desist
Im Pleased to assist
You malignant cyst
U must not exist
Please Die right now
I have to insist,
Hands behind ur bk
U must not resist,
Pickin pockets & Stealing lines
All these Petty crimes
You commit,
Fainthearted Weak minded,
Your soul's
A timid,
Amid my rise to the top
Will find time
To make to a
Pit stop,
To get *******
To make a btich stop
A *** to **** on
A phone to watch ****
A tiit to **** on
A fit to bit on
A clique to bank on
A cliit to play ball
A ball to roll on
A lawn to mow grass
A bowl to smoke
Grass,
New kicks
To kick 
Asse
An asse to bust a nut
A nut to run to bolt
A bolt to cause Thunder
So i can bury you *******
Under.

Infinite stream
Bytes
Everything is a matrix
Of information

Some i prioritize
Some i ignore
Some i choose to give meaning

Is that the meaning encoded in the stream?
Or my overlay?

Can i separate my impulse from the incoming signal?
Divide it from the trigger
Slice off the arousal?

The stream of ****
Must it force a rise out  of me?

Or is it just...
Another meaningless image
Saturated with lust
A sponge absorbing and bursting
With the prurient soaking
A blob of sweaty damp pheromones

Best washed away
In the predawn rain of innocence?

Shall The Music End ?
love is caught between the Earth & cell
rot inside it's orphan trail...
silence onto it's beckoning call
spray the onion brought to its style,
reach toward the barren trees that are plant
caught between an orphan shell
sing for me beneath the trees
staple in your rights that ******;
radio leads the right place to go
bust up the beat to promote the tempo;
wisdom is the principle thing
therefore gain wisdom and with all thy getting gain understanding

Shall the music end,
flakes to hide **** its midnight swim
march below its lady swing
Shall the music end ?
What has Trump done ?
Many questions to perceive.
light the torch of hallow swim

Shall The Music End ?