"durex" poems
while trying to buy some durex
he trembled to his roots
this is just a sport shop sir
you'd better try at boots
half an hour later
fearing confrontation
i'd like to buy a rubber thing
with batteries and vibration
once more the lady scowled
while showing him the door
this is just a sport shop
and don't come back for more
i want some k.y. jelly
he whispered his demand
her patience now exhausted
manager came to hand
what's the problem sir?
you seem a little harassed
welsh rugby, shirt he mumbled
but i'm too embarrassed
Mar 14, 2010
Mar 14, 2010 at 1:47 AM UTC
Asked I eventually for her name.
And she to me said, Miss Summer ***
And thine? required the the fair dame.
I'm Sexton. Yes,
The Sixth Sexton Durex.
Told I her as she's frolickin' 'bout me free.
Although looketh she supernaturally gay,
On that beach, in her birthday suit;
But seein' we two were in pursuit
Of Sainthood could we not Hollywood play--
Except 'gainst temptation to pray,
From which a man should rather flee!
Oct 9, 2011
Oct 9, 2011 at 10:57 AM UTC
Riches or Heartfill?
Crowded, Packed, and running
"Don't be late!"
"Hand in by due date!"
New to have a clue
"But don't drool!"
Eyes stapled open
"I don't want to miss a single word"
"This test is ******* absurd!"
Solving equations
"But read the text"
"If you don't pay attention, You'll NEVER be next"
Next
What is next?
A rolex?
A lot of money and some *****
Where is the Durex?
("*Remember kids, safe *** is great ***
I don't want to be these things that are required of me.
I want to be me
And I don't want you to see me as my failure
I need you to see me as ME
My body yearns for love and my mind longs for truth
This heart needs more than just an empire of hard work and accomplishments.
Imagination and dreams
Dreams I work towards.
Kisses and Hugs
to back me up
Don't you dare say
I should give up
Don't you dare say
I can't
Don't you dare say
I won't.
**** You
I WILL
I WILL be successful
While minding my manners
I will stay determined
No matter where the spotlight is
My will is humble
My gifts will never be numbered
And the next time they point a finger at you, you tell them
My right is not a game
Stop treating this like it's a game
We are not pawns in a game of Chess
Baby it's more than being just broke, broken, brittle, bent over
time after time after time after time again.
So make this one count!
And end it with a
"Hip Hip Hooray!"
Jan 20, 2015
Jan 20, 2015 at 1:25 PM UTC
I’m off out down to town, I’m off out for the night
I’m dressed-up to the nines, oh what a lovely sight.
I’ve got my shiny shoes on, I’ll get in any place
I’ve got my brand-new suit on and my Durex just in case.
I’ve learnt a trendy dance this week I’m off down to the Ritz
I’ll spin and do the moon walk, might even try the splits.
I’ll pick me out a woman and pester her all night
I’ll tell her all about myself and set her heart a light.
Might by myself some bubbly, make them think I’m rich
All the girls will love me and the lads will all be sick.
I’ll wear my Rolex wrist watch and my golden belcher chain,
and my diamond studded cuff-links, might even take a cane.
I’ve been down to the barber’s, for a Kevin Keagan perm
I’ve been under the sunbed for a thirty minute burn.
I’ve plucked out all the hair, from my nose and my ears
I wear a leather G-string; got both ******* pierced.
I move like John Travolta, smile like Steve McQueen
there’s not one thing I’d alter I’m the perfect specimen.
I am a medical marvel, I am a bundle of fun
there’s no one else quite like me; I’m the special one.
The end
Aug 3, 2015
Aug 3, 2015 at 2:37 PM UTC
What the heart wants got me in parts, it haunts me
Tellin me its okay to love but then like no, don’t let it be, flee
Thought it all fit like a glove, but guess it was the wrong hand
Nothing went as the plan, now I’m still in a defensive stand
Ready to fight at any time because theres no more trust
Getting ready to make anyone at all times bite the dust
Don’t trust you nor even my own self because I’ve been too long trapped inside myself
Maybe I should just leave the heart stored in a farway shelf
Cause it seems so easy to love but I never feel like I belong
Wish I was wrong but in the long run I might just resort to the ****
To feel like I’m here and loved because no matter what I feel like I’m void
Emotionless but emotional maybe I just need a date with Freud
Because I’ll love you and then I’ll just want to destroy you
You never hurt me but I’ve hurt myself I planned my own coup
But I dreamed you were holding the knife. There standing in the pool of my blood
And that is enough for me to drag you through the mud
I like that rush, let me rush right into ***
I like this song come on slip on the durex
But then two years from now you’ll talk about kids and marriage
You got no idea what I got in storage cause I’m basically practically made of baggage
A week from that talk I’m gonna be gone and we’re done
Because its not you. Its me, I’m ******
Cause I’ll grow bored and tired and you wont even expect it
Cause I got the wit and I’m quick to call everything quit.
Oct 26, 2017
Oct 26, 2017 at 8:03 PM UTC