I saw the letters

that you tried to hide from me

infact... We all did.

it comes in flashes
bright, red-hot
you feel it take over and if you feel it fast enough,
you can destroy everything in your path within moments
you spew words like venom and leave scars without thinking twice
and when it's over and done with,
you hate yourself for it.
this is what anger is,
this is how you have made cynics out of every person that's ever loved you.

In my dreams is where you live, it's the only place I see you.
In reality life isn't worth living but worth dreaming.
In my dreams you belong...
One day I'll wake up from this.
One day I'll feel your kiss.

So my life is ficked up, and i need someone to help me make a choice in my life
so here it is ...
If you were in my shoes would you choose someone you loved and cant go a day without or family who care about you no matter what
My sister dated this guy for a bit and i know this sounds bad but we fell in love with each other it didnt work with each other , I know it will work for each other thie thing is if i go for this she is never going to talk to me again she will push me away , she loves me im not doing this to her to try hurt her
Im not a bad person sometimes we dont choose the person we love it just happens i  wish she would understand that if she makes me choose her im not going to able to be around her This is the demon I face im not scared of him because im loooking at myself ... things are going down hill its making me want to give up on myself ...... im stuck in this hole I want him in my life and I want my family to be there too... no one going to not like me but i dont care , I just care about what my sister has to say about this.