Stuck in the backseat,
Of the car that you are driving,
Pretty rashly,
Rocking me back and forth,
Left and right,
Bruising me up just the way,
You killed my heart and love,
Averting your eyes away from my fearful ones,
Shushing my cries with the loud stereo,
You continue racing,
Destroying everything in your path,
The exact way you knocked me out,
A million times,
Disabling me to move, run, get away,
Just like right now,
Stuck in the backseat,
Of the car that you are racing,
Unable to jump out,
The mendacious hope holding me back,
That everything would soon be alright,
That you would change and love me,
Cherish me and care for me,
The way you always promise to do.

Right now,
This very second

Someone is dying
Someone is being born

Someone is crying
Someone is laughing

Someone is graduating
Someone is starting fresh

Someone is being threatened
Someone is being helped

Everywhere you look
And everywhere you don’t
People experience all kinds of things

And now as I sit here,
Luckily have two options
Either to be sad and confused and frustrated
About my situation
Or be thankful and grateful for the chance
I am getting to re-establish.

She wasn’t my love
She wasn’t my friend

She wasn’t a stranger
She wasn’t an acquaintance

She’s dead,
Has been for long

But somehow she’s still haunting me,
By living in my writings

I know I don’t have physically visible scars,
But in no way does that mean,
I don’t hurt,
I don’t punish myself.

I freeze in the cold,
Boil in the heat,
Starve in hunger,
Suffer in thirst,
Drench in the rain,
Die with the spice.

I have scars,
All over my soul,
Heart and mind.

Scars,
Those that never heal,
Those that always bleed.

Never say I don’t hurt.
I probably hurt more than you.

Like the clouds,
Her eyes watered.

Like the sirens,
Her ears buzzed.

Like the desert,
Her mouth was parched.

Like on a roller coaster,
Her heart raced.

Like the waves,
Her life staggered.

Like a corpse,
She soon laid dead,
Blood oozing out of her veins,
Like that of a nosebleed.

I live by the mountains,
With the grass so green,
Sun so bright,
But I don’t feel like I belong.

I go to the sea shore,
With the water so clear,
Where I was born,
I still, just can’t fit in.

I went to a new country,
To start fresh,
To make a home,
Filled with new
Memories and achievements
Yet I still don’t feel home.

Where is my home?
Where will I find it?
When will I finally feel peace?
How much longer do I have to wait?

I kept waiting,
No one came.

I kept hoping,
Nothing changed.

I stopped and
You entered.

I stopped hoping,
You changed everything.

I smiled again,
I lived,
I trusted,
I believed,
I HOPED again.

Then you left,
Dropping me from my high,
I broke more.
I hurt more.
But I cried less.