I’m sorry. Two simple words that speak measures about the things I didn’t say.

Dad.
I’m sorry that I couldn’t have been a better person.
I couldn’t always keep my room clean or keep my grades high.
I wasn’t always the easiest person to talk to or even understand.
I didn’t make life for you easier, and for that: I’m sorry.

Brother.
I’m sorry I said words I didn’t mean and didn’t fully understand how much they affected you.
I rejected your forms of affection and care because I thought I didn’t deserve them.
I pointed fingers and made empty promises without justification.
I spoke to you bitterly and harshly, and for that: I’m sorry.

Mom.
I’m sorry. To you the most, I’m sorry.
I wasn’t the daughter you wanted me to be.
I turned my back on your advice and guidance.
We often fought over views that didn’t align.
We were two opposites, but unlike magnets, I didn’t fight to make us connect.
And for that: I’m sorry.

To all those I have hurt:
I’m sorry.
I wasn’t the person you needed me to be.
I couldn’t be more, even when I wanted to.
But I hope you know I loved you,
in all the ways I knew how,
even if it wasn’t enough.

To be human means to suffer.
To fight for a permanent fulfillment that never truly existed.

No matter how perfect my roadmap is,
it will never follow that predestined trajectory.

This was a hard truth to accept because
humans have a fragile need to control.
It might be their ego or pride,
but when things don’t bend their way they get enraged.

They become too deeply attached to this impossible idea of perfection.
It’s just that life is so imperfectly beautiful and complicated,
but that’s the best part.

Embracing the unpredictability of life means to acknowledge that…
no matter how hard life gets,
it has a funny way of letting things fall just right where they were meant to be.

This doesn’t justify the cruelty of the world.
The genocides in Rwanda,
war on Israel,
millions dead and injured,
worldwide injustice.

It’s also important to realize that cruelty was not natures fault,
it was us.
We created the evil in the world,
but just try not to be the cause of it.

Learning how to live with cruelty is vital. Realizing that life wasn’t ever meant for death,
but it has it anyways.
It is important to balance these two points.

Accepting the hardships that come with life means living truly at peace.
This also doesn’t change the fact that life is difficult,
it just makes it more tolerable.

Love is the person that cared.

Love is the person who remembers
my favorite candy
while passing by it at a gas station aisle.

Love is the person who taught me
kindness—
that despite my own ignorance,
I should still treat others well.

Love is the person who stayed
when it was tough,
when I felt the heavy weight of life,
and made it just a bit lighter.

Love is our inside jokes
and knowing glances,
how we understood each other’s
unspoken words
like second nature.

Love was all the second chances,
every opportunity you gave me
for redemption,
no matter how bad it was.

Love was all the silent car rides,
the radio playing slow,
when the world seemed to stop,
and it was just us.

Love was the trust I gave you,
the heart-to-hearts,
and the depth we shared.

Love was the person holding me close
when I didn’t want to be alive,
the one who reassured me
when everything fell apart.

Over time, I learned—
love isn’t always romantic,
it isn’t always chocolate boxes
or red roses.

Love was those intimate moments
we shared.

Love is holding on,
even when it it felt tough.

Love was my family and friends—
because despite everything,
we held on.

When will it ever be enough?

As a kid, I was always taught to reach my potential—
to set goals above my expectations
and work hard to become a better version of myself.

But when will this version be enough?
When do I finally come to terms with myself?
Will I ever be at peace with whom I’ve come to be.
Satisfied with the person I’ve built for years?

When will I learn to accept
that I don’t have to be at constant war with myself
for simply being normal?

As Mary Oliver once said:
“You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.”

But in this society, it feels impossible.

They’ve linked the term mediocre
with failure,
and so, at night,
many stare at their ceiling,
feeling like a let-down,
simply because they couldn’t be more.

It’s why elderly men don’t retire—
because even at their age,
they’re expected to keep improving.

But what if we chose instead
to normalize self-acceptance?
What if we allowed ourselves
to recognize the effort
that carried us to where we are today?

It’s okay if you’re not the next millionaire.
You don’t have to be the next Albert Einstein.

So many tell us that life is about growth—
a constant journey of becoming better.
And maybe they’re right.
But life is also too short
to live with the endless mindset
of wanting to complete everything
in the span of one lifetime.

We must learn to appreciate.
To slow down,
and build our own meaning.

Because it never depended on anyone else.
It didn’t matter
when your boss labeled you as ‘replaceable’
It didn’t matter
when you anticipated that raise
and never got it.
It didn’t matter
when you hit rock bottom
and struggled to stand again.

Remember this:
Being human never made you weak.
It made you uniquely capable
of becoming stronger.

Life is what you make of it—
not what others call average,
but what you choose to see as
success.

There’s no such thing as
‘being behind in life’.

Maybe yours took a different
course.
Life happens for a purpose,
and I firmly believe that.

Perhaps you got held back a year,
maybe you didn’t get the promotion you were hoping,
maybe you became a late mother.
Perhaps you fell in love late.

Whatever happened in life
was meant to be.

I don’t believe in destiny,
but when it comes down to it
life has a funny way of
showing you
exactly what is meant for you.

But my point is:

Don’t stress
because you feel left behind.

Humans have a fragile need to control the uncontrollable.
Such as the future.
But that is just ridiculous,
let your life flow how it’s supposed to.

My world didn’t end at 14,
and it surely won’t end at 18..
or 19…
all the way to 80
(might end later, but not today).

Sometimes
letting things go,
letting things happen,
is the healthiest option
for your wellbeing.