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theboy Jun 2015
6/7
sickly, sticky, sweaty
this humidity houses me
contains comfort in its
slowly shifting drafts of moisture
oh a summer evening
it's been raining all day
the best way
the on again
off again
torrential downpours
nature's attempts to purge
a fresh start once more
but as the rain departs
it leaves dark traces
some of what it carried
left behind, once more
theboy Jun 2015
this sound is surrounding
these voices abounding
my sanctuary has walls
paper thin between its halls

grating, chipping
slowly sifting
the sands of time
through my unwilling mind

stress is quickly rising
paranoia hiding
behind this smile
I would run for miles

thoughts escaping
noises ******
inner peace
stop it please

muscles twitching
fingers gripping
dark sheets
hard, please
stop the
noise
save my
health
just a
boy
with no-one
else
theboy May 2015
No, I'm not paranoid
and I don't like that look you're giving me
I've told you a hundred times
Its not possession I seek

a fragile flower
I don't want to suffocate you
fold your beautiful petals
and stick you in my pocket

but it makes me sick
right to my stomach
to think of you blooming
in anyone else's garden

I care because I care
Even if you don't see
besides, the little green monster
hails from the heart, not the head
the title is accurate, I found this in a side folder on my computer.
theboy May 2015
_
Oh, how easy it must be
to pride yourself on the line
formed at your foot
when you lack awareness
of its nature, its through-ness

Taking rotations
brought high by your motion
at the peak
afforded a view of the
desolate, crumbling city you inhabit
many fleeing after the first glimpse
others needing more convincing
"just one more spin"
but in the end
none stay

Still
you blame
the supposedly fickle hearts
of men and women alike
finding the image of
your George Washington Gale
in their departing silhouettes
but have you ever noticed
the likeness of your shadow
to the emptiest number?
I thought not

Easier to find them
the demon
in your sparkling town
than to find yourself
a novel attraction
in their metropolis of life

One day
with chipped paint
and rusted bolts
you will find yourself
too tired to revolve any longer
inertia holding your stillness
close, a dead man's grip
A kindred soul, with an ache
in their bones
will walk
at their own pace
through the queue, feet falling
where children once stood,
waiting eagerly for your allowance
The cemetery walker
will find a low
still
seat, and
settle.

They will be spared
the bird's eye exhibition
of the abandoned streets
the husks of industry
the empty parks
but
still
your city remains
and if you are lucky
they will stay
still.
theboy May 2015
Let me be the memory
you see a glimpse of
when you sneeze.

Ah, ahh, ahhh, you
something not so sad today
theboy May 2015
today i feel hollow
for writing nothing
but irritated texts
my intent
penned in action
both half truths
spoken confidently
like a well practiced reading

today i feel treacherous
for not fighting very hard
letting this ground
disappear beneath me
sinking without struggle
welcoming the warm embrace
of the oh to familiar
the persistent 'friend'

today, i feel trapped
for being where i am
this room, this mind
this life story
i don't call it mine
i would like to pen that one
with a lazy ending
cause i've never finished strong

today i feel dangerous
don't touch me
i need a warning
label, **** this repetition
lets break stained glass
windows lets litter in
the streets lets
burn our parents masterpiece

today i feel open
but tomorrow i may not
creaking loudly as my doors
close quickly, don't be caught between
these swings remain risky
running a hot glass
under cold water
shield your eyes
theboy May 2015
I rarely edit my work
I prefer the fresh
green
words that sprout in the moment
There is something disingenuous to me
about letting someone
even a later self
uproot and replant my ideas

My mother wants me to
let the editors inside
she wants me to open my sanctuary
to the norms
the opinions
the pen
of the world

I'm afraid to touch my own words
because god loves ugly
because
I
love ugly
what would happen
if I let
them
touch my thoughts?

I think therefor I am
so if they help me think
am I still?

give me your downcast, your ugly, your broken
the grit and the grime of your teeming mind
I lift    my       pen, I peel back the wool
this is life, there is no golden door of escape

complacency is sickness
have I found it
of from it do I flee?
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