my soul is a tragedy
trouble follows me incessantly
it's become a part of me
is everything going to be better when i disappear?

i am the reason for my lowest point
my enemy has always been me
if only death could embrace me
quickly and painlessly
a sweet escape from myself and this cruel life

you kept your face under a white coat
afraid to reveal yourself
in fear of me despising you
while i fell for the true you
until now, without a face
mature with probable heartbreaks
I'll admire you from afar
without feeling no sympathy
you're destined inside a cave
you came out as I did anticipate
I couldn't pinge you with a code
we could not get any farther
you still refused with a hidden intention
that coincides with my morbid gut
a delayed medication that could've come from you
I'll hide in anonymity because you're hard to please in your hard-to-reach place
you'll find me dead and gone in lost time and space

why do you feel so alive
why do you not want to die
all caught up in life
like thousand years can get by
say i'm running out of time
when i want to run out of life
everyone's the same at some point
to the point you can't rely
thinking that nothing works for myself
in times of everyone's triumph
trying to see through your new eyes
sparkling like a faraway star
that has long been killed by time
and soon will lose its life
just as no one remembers
well, to my surprise i'm staring at
my reflection,
i was the one who bore the light

9
[I love the sensual
For me this
And love for the sun
Has brilliance and beauty]

The stars shine with you
See you in the day
Seize me with light
Until I become blind

Out of sight
Out in the night
The moon shines
And borrowed your light

I feel like burning
Body, dehydrating
I regret staying
Under the menace of the sun

Plastic strips or human spleen
A random thought, a gift to me
All distractions I have tried
The vibrance in me have died

All I do I keep to myself
From judging predators, all monsters
All of them, contributors
To the inferno in my mental realm

No human can ever understand
Before I pull the rope or strand
Pierce my vein, beating now
I want no pain so tell me how

Stitches from my childhood
I cut open without direction
Remedy me like a therapy would
Priorities have no intention

I cling to my red earphones
Spikes, I took off these arms
A cap to conceal this fatal beat
No end, no rhyme

get me through the rough
see through the sun
blinding my existence
a phenomenon I want to end

asked to craft words
when pain is the only source
breathing as I am forced to
running short of reasons

forlorn in blazing crowd
masking the status quo
fully erase the context
to fit in your norms

I still fret a lot
I find no validation
people are for themselves
pretending they are not
like these words lacking rhymes