here i am- all in, all yours


and then there's you...

im sorry i jumped. im sorry i woke up one day and found myself being the lover before you were ready, and capable, of loving me.
im sorry i threw myself in, to drown in what i hoped would be, while all you did was swim.
and i realize now that maybe that's where i went wrong in all my past relationships.
maybe that's where i went wrong with you.
you loved me in june, and more in july, but the seasons have changed, and as fall came so did we. fall, to pieces, a part, and now here we are, scrambling to pick up pieces that no longer fit.
im sorry, but it's not like it ever mattered anyways with you.

Miris ukoričenih stranica:
Poznat prizor raširenih ruku.
Ona sjedi.
Mirna. Pogleda uperena u neke daleke svjetove.
Gdje li je sada - tek siluete odaju
(Uživa li istinski?)
Krivulja u kutu usana,
odsjaj sunca u lutajućim očima.
More! Njemu putuje, znam.
Ona sretna je - sluti dom.
U njenim očima ustaju valovi,
morske mijene igraju u pogledu:
plima i oseka izmjenjuju se
na pučini njezinih snova.
Vječno sniva o modroj svakodnevici,
o slanim jutrima i čarobno crvenim zalascima.
Iz sna budi je vlak na trećem peronu.
Uz dubok udah spoznaje da ovuda
galebovi ne lijeću, vode slane nisu niti
srce na mjestu počiva.
(Što sve uzdah neće skriti)
No krivulja ne jenjava.
Snovi tek su vremenom udaljeni!
A čitav svijet pogled je daleko.
Ona lijepa je dok prebire po slovima
radošću djeteta koje putuje.
Bože, koliko života u jednom kupeu!

I'm sorry I had let you down.
And I'm sorry I broke your heart.
I'm sorry I ended up leaving
When I said we'd never be apart.

I'm sorry I pushed you away.
And I'm sorry I let you in.
But know you were the closest to me
That a person has ever been.

I'm sorry I gave up on you
And every "I love you" I managed to say.
I'm sorry I promised to be by your side
And for the mind games we often played.

I'm sorry I'm messed up
And for every single thing I do.
I'm sorry I wasn't the one in the end.
And for not being there for you.

I'm sorry enough to say I'm sorry.
Oh, how sorry I truly must be.
To write these words over and over again
In a poem that you'll never see.