Tark Wain

Tark Wain Aug 2015

Thoughts

I waste time worrying about the things that won't happen
therefore preventing things that should

Tark Wain Aug 2015

I want to talk to you all about death

not the idea of it
but the reality of it
When somebody dies that isn't just a statistic
a faceless body thrown to the wind

that person is just like you
it's not someone whose skin was different
who wore their hair a different way

no

that person ate food like you do
they worried about their future like you do
they turned off the channel when they couldn't find anything entertaining to watch on t.v. like you do
they rode their bike but not as often as they'd like just like you do

they worried if they weren't good enough

they questioned God's existence
they dreamed
they complained when their noses got stuffy
don't agree with death because you believe people are
different from you
revolt against it because
they are the same

Tark Wain Aug 2015

Am I a Writer?

Im a writer that doesn't write
I tell myself that's it's normal
That it's natural
That I must have writers block

I know that's a lie

People ask me what I want to do
I say screenwriter
They think I'm smart, witty, creative
All of the above
The look they give me is a drug
I'm one of the special ones
I have ideas
To them I make things

But I don't.

I like to think I do.
Sure I tell myself that.
But I'm stuck writing stories I'll never finish
Down in books I'll never read

Why do I not read them?

I think it's because of a belief that I am inadequate
And therefore anything I create must be that way as well
The belief that someone like me shouldn't be able to create
I think that's why people look at me adoringly when they hear "screenwriter"
They want to love their ideas as much as they think I do mine.
They think I'm one of the ones that made it out
Which is something I desperately I want to be

So for now I am a writer that doesn't write
Which sadly means I am not a writer at all
But maybe I spoke to soon
Because if I wasn't a writer
I wouldn't have written this at all

Tark Wain Jul 2015

Depression is

Peeing in the shower
Before you even turn the water on

Tark Wain Jul 2015

I've Seen People Jump

A lot of people jump
I've seen it
they climb up on the railing

and they jump

they fall forever
in reality it's only a few seconds

but in their heads

it must feel like forever

do you think any of them regret it?

Answer

When the water is washing over them
and the tides engulf their lungs
and the salt stains their skin
and the pressure bursts their eye ***** open inside of their head

do you think they regret it then?

We all die William.

there's no sugar coating that
no amount of my preaching will make that ok
I get that
I can live with that

But if my belief in religion
and in turn my belief in you
keeps one person away from this railing

that would jump over it otherwise

well then that makes it all

seem real to me.

#religion

Tark Wain Jul 2015

Reasons

Everything happens for a reason
Said one man to another
that’s ******* you know he responded
and even if that was so
should it be some consolation
should I be amazed by the worlds complexity?
should I applaud the interwoven madness
if the one left out is me?

Does a bull admire a matador’s technique?
Does a building admire the strength of a wrecking ball?
Tell me why the system is great
why I should care about the meaning behind it all
what you have is what you love
and I could never love a theory
I believe in the material
because it’s the only thing my eyes can see

Tell me why my wife died
Was it to save a thousand lives?
because I would **** a thousand more
for one more look into her eyes
Maybe her death
somehow saved my life
well one day I will die
without the comfort of my wife

That’s all it really is my friend
a celebrated rain delay
God’s in his high chair
choosing who will go and who will stay
but eventually we will all leave
despite all the magic this universe has to offer
you believe in faith sir
but sadly I am bogged down in fact

The man was choked up
as he searched for words to answer the other
I did not know your babies mother
but my son did
She pushed him to safety from a car
taking the impact that was meant for him
so while I'm sorry for your loss friend
there is a reason behind everything

#love #death #happiness

Tark Wain Jul 2015

You Are Special

from birth everyone is told
that we are special

and we are

you are your own mind
your own body your own soul

that is special
but i think this belief
that we are great can hurt us
the fear that we wont live up to our expectations

can paralyze us

can make us doubt ourselves before anyone else
thinks to do so
we talk ourselves out of things for no reason
"that's not my calling
that's not for me
I mean she is better anyway"

it's *******

the world will tell you that you are not special
don't listen

don't let it conquer you

be remarkable
smile
tell somebody you love them
pick somebody up when they're down

pick up a baby
tell them that they are special
because despite the infinitesimal odds
they made it
they're here
don't expect anything less from yourself
than you'd expect from that child