I feel weak.
I feel sleepy.
I feel sad.
I feel this tightness in my chest.
Im shaking.. why did I do this to myself.
I can hear my heart beating faster and faster.
I don’t deserve this.
I feel dumb.
I feel sore.
Im tired
Im tired of everything..
we’re right back to where we started..

Benumbed I lie on the floor
Staring ferociously on the ceiling
Flecks of sunlight playing their
Daedelian games.
Wish I were one of them
Leaking into the rooms of strangers:
Lonely, catladies, family kitchens, new-born baby nurseries.
I would be welcomed everywhere.
Not likely now, not likely ever.

Tonight I'm...
Wearing my mom's red lipstick,
Getting all tangled up in cords
Thinking about how...
Your lover can turn you into magic
While I can only turn you into words
Thought together we...*
Could be more than just electric.
But did you know when we met, the angels all sang in accord?