Yiska slits
her thin wrist
-broken glass

in a bin
in the ward
what a find-

the blood comes
plentiful
beautiful

she reckons
sitting back
in the bath

of water
motherly
and warming

reddening
but a nurse
on duty

looking to
tell Yiska
the doctor

wanted her
finds her there
in the bath

drifting off
and blood soaked
EMERGECY

SUICIDE
the nurse yells
up the ward

-locked up ward
those who are
mentally

unstable
are caged here-
I am in

the main lounge
looking out
the window

snows falling
some robin
perches there

on a branch
Yiska said
earlier

she'd make it
out of here
one way or

the other
there's a rush
of nurses

and a quack
follows up
half way through

-I'm guessing-
his breakfast
there's egg yoke

at the side
of his mouth
poor Yiska

so depressed
no way out
she told me

but I guess
watching the
brave robin

sitting there
that there is
if you look

really hard
to get out
out somewhere.

And Mrs Shepherd said
come up
and see me sometime
-she was no Mae West

but she did her best-
and so I went
to her apartment
and she invited me in

and said
sit on the couch
and I'll get us drinks
so I sat on the couch

and watched her
get two tumblers of scotch
and she had a neat ***
compact body

and fine hair
in a kind of
Clara Bow style
and she came back

to the couch
and sat down
handing me my drink
and she said

how'd you like me?
it was warm afternoon
the sun was strong
and poured itself

on her red carpet
you're fine
I said
she smiled and said

no I meant
how'd you like me to be?
laying out here
on the couch

or the floor
on all fours?
there was a picture
on one wall

of a vase of flowers
sunflowers big and yellow
I'm not sure
what if your hubby comes in

while we're at it?
o don't mind him
he's miles away
she said

put him right out
of your head
so what will it be
me spread here

with class or me
on all fours
and you take my ***?
the scotch was good

nice and smooth
and a dog barked some place
-she was no Mae West
but she did her best.

That monk
in the refectory
of the abbey,

bespectacled
with dark curly hair
like a cissy girl,

gave me the stare
as if I shouldn't be there,
but maybe

he wasn't
looking at me at all,
perhaps at the opposite wall

or a monk behind me
who stared back at him
with equal stare

wishing maybe
he wasn't there.
I cleaned the bogs

on the second floor,
swept the cloister
as if some

holy street
or one of them
in Jerusalem

where He once walked
or strolled with others
before the Roman's

did Him in.
The old peasant monk
sharpened his scythe

on the narrow stone,
before continuing
to cut the tall grass,

lonesome looking,
humble, God blessed,
as if not alone.

The old monk
with Parkinson’s disease,
bug eyed

through thick lenses
spectacles,
his fingers

shaking the host,
is unable to find
the tongue

in sick monk’s
static mouth.
I weeded

the cloister Garth
flower bed,
back aching,

God
at my young
bent shoulder.

The youngest monk,
squat and black robed,
holds the ewer,

while the abbot
holds between
knobbly fingers,

the aspergillum,
to bless the monks
in the choir stalls,

after Compline,
before
the Angelus calls.

That monk in the refectory
sitting there
reminded me

of old Jack:
same look,
same eyes,

that quiet presence.
The French peasant monk,
cutting back

the hedgerow
with a scythe,
black robed,

tonsured,
humble as cheese,
nods and bows.

I picked apples wrong
in the orchard,
the monk said,

he showed how,
his fine fingers
twisted just so,

feminine,
pinkish nails,
his dark tight curls

untonsured.
For whom the bells toll
down to the sea and beach?

I tossed stones
across the incoming tide,
further

than Brother Hugh
(moaning Myrtle)
could reach.