sometimes i think
if you asked who i am
i wouldn't be able to tell you

i used to think i was confused
now i'm certain it's true.
because the me that was then
has turned into a "you"

if i could taste the rainbow
i'd paint it just like michelangelo
i would sing about it like calypso--
every shade of indigo
broadcasted from my patio
so loud and sharp i'd get vertigo
my very own adagio

i know i'm not who you want me to be

but i cannot change the way i think or see

this beautiful, beautiful world around me

...running around this endless loop
as if i'm stick in a chicken coop
go too slow and i'll be soup
so i keep on...

sometimes i just want to take a break from being me
and be someone else for a little bit

i think it'd be nice to run away
but i'm stuck in a concrete prison

sometimes i just want to be done with this
and go somewhere i can be safe

i think it'd be nice to not have to try anymore
but my chains are too heavy to lift

Sometimes I can hold my head up
Sometimes I can fight back
Right now I can't walk away
Right now I can't make myself stay
Because my mind is on a tilt-a-whirl
Stuck in this dizzying loop of
Round and up and round and down
I'm being thrown around
Nobody else can see it because
It's all in my head
But my mind is on a tilt-a-whirl
I'm stuck in this dizzying loop of
Round and down and round and up
I think I've had enough
But my mind is on a tilt-a-whirl
I'm stuck in this dizzying loop of
Round and up and round and down
Why can't I stop?
My mind
Is on a
Tilt-a-whirl
I can't seem to stop
I'll be stuck here 'til I die
Going round and round and round

i found a poem saved here
it's a couple years old
i forgot that i wrote it.
to be honest, it's bad
no rhyme and no rhythm
no purpose to be had
but i think that it's useful
to see what they thought
and the words that they chose
because i didn't write it
where did they go?

Around me, I see the world
Undulate and fabricate
This warped sense of time and space
I see the world in a pantomime
It's simply this internal rhyme
I'm dying, but it's a victimless crime