How could fate have separated us?
I think of you and miss you.

I think of your warm and inviting smile
Of the laughter that now brings tears
And I miss you.

I think of your small body wrapped in my arms
Of the hands that caressed your hair
And I miss you.

I think of evenings in front of a fire
Of hot chicken soup now gone cold
And I miss you.

I think of you bravely waving good bye
Of the way you walked out of my sight
And I miss you.

I think of lessons you have taught me
Of the promises I keep
And I miss you.

Sometimes I scream because I have no one to touch, and my fingertips have been aching to feel the warm skin of someone other than myself.

little dark girl with
kind eyes
when it comes time to
use the knife
I won't flinch and
i won't blame
you,
as I drive along the shore alone
as the palms wave,
the ugly heavy palms,
as the living does not arrive
as the dead do not leave,
i won't blame you,
instead
i will remember the kisses
our lips raw with love
and how you gave me
everything you had
and how I
offered you what was left of
me,
and I will remember your small room
the feel of you
the light in the window
your records
your books
our morning coffee
our noons our nights
our bodies spilled together
sleeping
the tiny flowing currents
immediate and forever
your leg my leg
your arm my arm
your smile and the warmth
of you
who made me laugh
again.
little dark girl with kind eyes
you have no
knife. the knife is
mine and i won't use it
yet.