it feels like I've been walking on the same pavement riddled with the same fallen leaves spelling out regret and trap. it's lined with trees that look so barren that everything is starting to sound like the same kind of goodbye though I'm not really sure what they're saying goodbye to.
Reflective surfaces come in the form of my empty palms
and the crunch of leaves and the snapping of twigs just seem to whisper in my mind.
I've been walking on the same pavement and I'm not entirely sure why it is the same kind of brickwork. A little sloppy, if you ask me.
The signposts are broken and rotting and I haven't been able to make out the words that are haunting the seemingly endless bounds of my mind.
Have you seen the sun yet?
I can't seem to make sense of anything from the slight rain and the dense fog. There are stains on my sleeves and my shoulders are weighed down and sagged.
I've been trying to reason with myself that this is what I ought to be doing. I've been trying to reason with myself that this is the path I should be on to find whatever it is I've been looking for. I've been trying to reason with myself that I belong here, on this dark and cobbled pavement while my arms are riddled with horripilation and my chest is sputtering blood from the hollowness of it all.
I've found a weeping willow - it weeps like the heat from my neck and I haven't felt the coldness settle.
There's frost on my fingers but if it is any consolation, I have no idea how to love or deserve to be loved.
Where has the time gone? Can you tell me?
The rabbit holes are empty and there is a void where my heart ought to be. My lungs aren't burning but there's smoke escaping with every breath I let out.
It's been too long, it's been too solitary. I can almost feel the brittleness of the skeletal structure that keeps me collected.
And time has escaped me.
There are no sounds and my ears are deafened.
The cold is settling.
I can still see the pavement.
It's still empty.
Is there no life here?
Can anyone hear me?
I can feel my thoughts echoing.
Hello?

Blurred images
Hazy edged pictures
Images with burn holes 
Things to see behind
Clouds of lingering sleep
This is the first time in awhile
I've actually felt okay
The world is still moving to fast 
And me too slow
But my mind has a window
So I can see and hear 
Though my throat still 
Struggles for sounds
My hands form letters
That form words
That form phrases
My thoughts on pages 
My feelings on paper 
My soul wrapped into words
That will never be spoken 

These are my own words written by someone else, hope you guys enjoy my first poem in a while, things are actually improving. If im lucky i'll survive -Andy

To my friend lexi,

I spent so much time on these first few words
Looking foolish at my screen pondering in my own thoughts
Just wondering if I wrote this would it find its way to you
And if somehow it did, what would it do

From a distance I watched you smile
Listened to your laugh
Only to become paralyzed by the sight of your pretty brown eyes
Which caused me to become stomped

So nervous that my words become garbled
As I attempt to analyze this apocryphal event
Cause there is no way any of this could be real
Not in a million years, not including me!

But indeed it all authentic
All of this is real
You are not a figment of my imagination
No,You stand before me mocking me

If I were brave enough I would of held your hand
Squeezing it tight as I told my untold tale
About how you make me feel when talking to you
How I can't ever really frown while in your presence

But I have never been strong enough
So I just sit there smiling and laughing with you
Wishing these moments never have to end
That you and I would remain friends forever more

It is those moments I adore
There isn't a day that goes by I don't think of you
The sweet majestic tone in your voice
That amazing smile upon your beautiful face

It all just leaves me speechless in a way
There are never really any words to say
But it's never just us waving as the clouds glide away
No,it is always us wishing each other to stay

So Lexi my dear friend
Listen carefully to what I have to say
Don't go away
And promise I will do the same