Everywhere I walk
There are eye's
The gaze of my mistakes
No place to run or hide
From the empty open space
Thats inside.
Trying to forget
Only makes it harder
So I stopped fighting it
Then there's less regret
Why does the stare
Have to feel so
Excruciating
I guess its the hole
I dug for me
No amount of time
Can erase a memory
They will always remain
Forever etched in our brains
The constant reminder
That we are something
Or at least
Once upon a time we were.

I have made a mistake
I have made many
All of them
Leaving their trace
It's always a road
I must choose
But my choices
Haven't always been great
So I wonder
Is this where
Deception
Has led me
And what type
Of deception
That could be
Maybe its what people tell me
What they have all
Led me to believe
Or maybe
Its all on me

My king
is a man
of many mysteries
that even he
doesn't know
like the light
inside his beautiful
soul
or the handsome
man that beholds it

he doesn't know
the things I can see
and even though
he thinks
I'm blind
I'm not
because I can see
inside his being
that alluring
irresistible
core
which seems to draw me
in....and in...
and I can't find the will
to pull myself away
and frankly
I don't want too

He doesn't know
the things that I
can see
even if I were blind
to myself
thats just
me.
but I really can
see
into his delicate
heavenly
delightful
warming
immaculate
breathtaking
Soul­

He said
'Nothings Irreversible'
and I looked into
his mystical eyes
as he walked away
backwards
as if to make it
that much more dramatic
then he turned
and as I stared
into the wrinkles of his jacket
I thought to myself

Isn't everything we do
In fact
Irreversible?

I gave so much
at the expense of my own tarnished soul
and now you hate me,
why?
because I couldn't do it anymore?
or
because so quickly I was gone?
on an entirely different road
from what I once struggled along
I couldn't do that anymore
I needed to go
to get out
to be free
Whats wrong with you?
Did I not sacrifice enough of me
to meet your expectations?
would you rather I died?
Became a roadkill?
because that's where I was headed.

You say my face
Resembles beauty
You say that my heart
Does too
But when you tell me
I'm beautiful
It's not what I see
It's not how I feel
Maybe I am
But imagine not
Being able to Understand
Why someone
Can look at you
And say your beautiful
And you sit there
Trying so hard to believe
But you just
You just don't feel it
You don't feel that's what you are
Your more
Like nothing
Not ugly, but definetly not
Anything like beauty