stop saying you're miserable
because you don't know misery
it hasn't landed on your doors
nor has it ever been on your feet.

misery is a concept you're trying so hard to get to
and you destroy people to get to it
you cause misery
you are misery to people
but you will never feel misery
nor will you be able to claim
you're in misery
because misery is only for the good

they say time heals all wounds,
but i guess,
i wasn't just wounded,
when i lost you,
for after all this time,
i still bleed for you.

its been a long time,
since i've talked with you
and its been a longer time
since i've had you
near me.

for a while, i thought i was done
with all spectrum of emotions i felt for you.
for a while, i thought i no longer cared.
all those times were all in vain,
for i still miss you,
more than ever.

its all just hitting me now
every bone
every fiber
every nerve of me
is finally absorbing the shock
and
the thought of you,
gone,
and away from me.

i wish you'd come back.
**or rather, i wish i never left

my sweet darling,
this is my confession to you --
to not be with you
to not go out and look for you
is the most difficult challenge
and the hardest form of love
i will ever do.

i lost the other half of my self within you
and i have not been able to get it back
ever since
you and  i
fell apart.

i know you do not want me to seek for you
i know you want me to let you go
and i have, in all the ways i can
but my heart cannot,
my mind cannot set you free
for i bound myself to you and only you
for ages to last.

and though some days i attempt to unchain myself,
it is you,
ultimately,
only you,
and your love --
that can set me free.


if you choose to love me right this time,
and destiny decides to tear us apart,
then i will know --
i shall know,
that you've set me free,
the universe and you,
have set me free.

as I sat down one day,
I tried to remember you,
to think of you,
to write about you.
I could not form the words that I wanted to say --
the words I wanted you to hear
the words I wanted you to see.

as I sat down one day,
I heard your laugh at the edge of my ears,
I saw the flash of your smile from the corner of my eyes,
I smelled the scent of your hair from the tip of my nose.

I wish I never sat down that one day.
Sadness was what it brought me,
for I can only remember the good in you,
and
I
still
can't
find
myself
for I am lost in the worst part of you.

as I sat down one day,
I remembered,
I disintegrated.

I beg you to not be temporary.
I beg you to be the one with me at 3 am
I beg you to take me seriously
because underneath all the jokes,
the laughter,
your frustration towards me,
I am slowly
gravitating
towards
you
in the most human
and vulnerable
way possible.
I beg you to stay.
I just can’t say it yet
because every time I do,
the opposite occurs
so I’ll write about it.
I’m falling in love
with
you
and
its
stupid.
So please.
I beg you not to run away with my heart.
I beg you to stay
for a while.

when you’ve traced
every corner of my body
and have felt
the brittleness of my bones
—and when you’ve brushed
your fingers
through every inch
of my skin,
promise me
you won’t break me

when you’ve bit my lips
and find it bleeding
know that I’m vulnerable to your lies

and when you’ve kissed my tears
and find my eyes lost
know that I’m fragile to your touch

All that is gold does not glitter,

Not all those who wander are lost;

The old that is strong does not wither,

Deep roots are not reached by the frost.

From the ashes a fire shall be woken,

A light from the shadows shall spring;

Renewed shall be blade that was broken,

The crownless again shall be king.