I miss you
you may have annoyed me to the point I wanted to scream
but I love you and miss you
you were the closest thing I had to a brother
and you had to leave
move across the country
and leave me
by myself
whose gonna tease me?
whose gonna protect me?
whose going to tickle me?
whose going to kick me out of the front seat?



whose going to be my annoying big brother?

late nights are my favorite part of day
my thoughts suddenly expand
my passion and dreams become real
i say things I wouldn't have the guts to say in the day
I find out my own secrets
I see a future full of happiness
sometimes I will think back from months ago my dreams and fantasies from dusk are no longer dreams
no longer fantasies
they are coming to life
and that's the power of night

if I'm the only person who thinks I did the right thing then so be it

if I am the only person that I understands then so be it

if I'm the only person that doesn't think of me differently after then so be it

if I am the only person that loves me
then so be it

if I am the only person who feels alone
then so be it

if nobody listens to my side of the story because they are to quick to judge then so be it

so be it

I am not full of sadism
it may seem like so
but don't people say go with the flow?
that's why I said what I said
but you didn't believe me anyway
in a year this won't matter to you
in 3 years we will both look back and laugh
we were naive
full of fear & and not full comprehension
of what was going on
of what we were doing
and how full of adulation we were
I could go back and change it
but we know that life would be vapid

have you ever broken someone's heart?
cause I have
you are the villain
it like they're listening to their favorite song and you come and turn it off

it's like they finished building a masterpiece and you kick it over

it's like they finally stepped out of their wheelchair and you break their leg

they got out of a burning building and you set them on fire

they are on the right side of the road and you come head-on

eventually you get hurt too

but somehow you still tell yourself the biggest lie around

"it wasn't my fault"

it's my fault
im sorry
that i wasn't there for you
I wasn't accepting to your dream
i lead you to think fondly of me
im sorry
I kept you up late at night
I said I missed you
I'm sorry I spoke the truth
I'm sorry i wasted your time
that I hugged you tight
that when I saw you I would smile
I'm sorry
is all that comes out