The salty breeze
Such a nostalgic smell
As we comb the beach
Looking for shells

As the gulls overhead
Squawk and they cry
We lie in the sun
Not a cloud in the sky

All these unique rocks
As far as can see
And each of them has
Their own story

My hair always tussled
By the breeze
I walk and I smile
And I look out to sea

I am a magician
And this is my magic wand
Casting a spell over you,
Guiding your emotions,
And sharing mine.

This wand removes
The walls I *****
During the day,
Tearing them down easier
Than wrapping paper
From a new present
On Christmas morning.

This wand gives shape
To the alien world that
Lies in my mind, and
Gives the characters a
Body, voice, and identity.

This wand casts a spell
Over the most beautiful girl
In the world.
Sending emotions flowing
Towards her like
Rose petals down a stream.

This magnificent wand
Records my  thoughts,
Almost of its own accord,
As they flow from
My mind.

My wand
My voice
My light

*my pencil

I guess I can't find what I'm looking for
By staring into an empty hole I discovered.
No matter how much of my heart I pour into it,
It will never reciprocate a gentle caress,
Or a loving look that sees nothing else.
No matter how much attention I payed to my precious hole,
Someone came and filled it up.
Covering over and trapping that part of my heart.
Every time my eyes wander over that freshly churned dirt,
There is no respite from the pain
As that half of my heart throbs,
With longing I am not capable of understanding.
Why do I crave to surrender the rest of my heart,
Even though I know there are no take-backs.
Why can't I move on as you have?

lie with me
until the moon says it's last goodbye
and the sun peeks his head up
hoping to catch his lover before she leaves
then lie with me longer

kiss me
like the wave kisses the beach
drawing in then drawing out
never ending their dance
then kiss me longer

hold me
as the earth holds the tree
never letting go
even through the roughest storm
then hold me harder

love me
with the passion of a thousand summer thunderstorms
a mix of every emotion
fighting for dominance
then love me *harder

Your fingers
Playing a tune on my six part heart
My hollow body
Enhancing the harmonious chords
So the whole world may understand
For when I am with you
There's nothing to fear
Because what's there to be afraid of
When music is near.

as i put you in the back of my mind
and try to forget
try to move on
i can't

as i stare at her
with her blonde hair
and wax to her my affection
which is there...
but not

this affection i feel
for her and her sandy hair
is like a pebbles ripples
compared to the tsunami
of muddy brown eyes and hair
that you are

The moon chases the sun
Unceasing and undying
Glowing from the beauty
Of the distant sun

Winter chases summer
Year after year
It's loving touch
Melting the built up ice

The desert misses rain
Hanging on every word
As the clouds whisper
Relishing memories of
Raindrops gentle caress


I will chase you
Like the moon chases the sun
Glowing
From the reflection of your beauty

I will chase you
Like winter chases summer
Your loving touch
Melting my built up ice

I miss you
Like the dessert misses rain
Hanging on your every word
Relishing the memories
Of your gentle touch

I need you like plants need sunlight and oxygen

*i need you

To my brother

monkeys cartwheel as we dance
letting our frivolous attitudes take us deeper and deeper into this wonderfully dangerous jungle called love.
sometimes you will find love in the most curious of places. 
a bus stop
a coffee shop
in a bar
or at a summer camp.
but once you find it you will know.
it will be like a wave has just hit you and sent you reeling
searching for a place to anchor yourself, but hoping you don’t find one.
it will be like you have let go of the trapeze and as you soar through the air looking for the next bar to grab, you hope there isn’t one, and that you just keep on sailing
past everyone else
but you
and her.
it will feel like you are coming closer and closer to the sun, and all your body is telling you to do is run because you know you might be burned, but another part tells you that there is a mystery there I f you can just get close enough. 
it will feel like getting hit by a train, and then begging the train to hit you again, and again, and again.

But it will also feel like lying in a meadow, staring up as the few clouds drift lazily by. as the sky darkens and the few wispy clouds drift away leaving a view of the terribly frightening and beautiful night sky.
the night sky that is just waiting for you to jump, to sail from this earth. to trust yourself and jump. jump away from all reason and everything you have been taught. to trust the one thing that is able to hold you entirely true. to trust your heart and leap. leap as you have never leaped before, because if you do not, if you don’t put your whole essence into that one leap, you will fall back to earth, and land a broken pile of dreams. broken dreams. all because you didn’t trust your heart. all because you listened to all the people who hadn’t believed in themselves. all the people who had fallen before you. so listen to me. i have jumped, and i haven’t given it my all, but i haven't hit the ground yet, i merely hit the canopy. so now i will climb until i reach the stars. i will make a ladder to the moon, and then from there to the farthest star, until i find it. 
so jump.
jump with all your might
jump until your legs have fallen off.
because its harder to jump when they're broken
hey, the worst that can happen, is that you don’t jump at all,
and remain tied to the earth. 
so fly with me brother.
fly to the stars and back and find that love.
trust your heart now and forever.

the constant*  pounding
as my cleats repeatedly hit the grass
and the lactic acid frees itself

the constant  pounding
of the blood as it rushes
through my spinning head

the constant  pounding
as I see two
of the person in front of me

the constant  pounding
as I push my jelly filled legs
to keep going

the constant  pounding
as I push them even harder
than before

the constant  pounding
of my heaving lungs
as I try to **** in more oxygen

the constant  pounding
of my body
as I fall over the finish line

The beach is her,
she is the beach.
Am I staring through two ports
out at the wild sea,
or at her brilliant blue eyes
that stare back at me.
The contour of her jaw
matches the curve of the shore
as the tide and her recede,
I'm left begging for more.
As the sand runs through my fingers
going everywhere,
I realize it matches the color
of her flowing blonde hair.
As she plays on the beach
in the sun, in the sand
all I want is to be with you
walking along the beach hand in hand.
As the waves lap bare feet
and the sun sets beside us,
the salty breeze carries sand
from the beach, that seems to belong to us.
I take my hand from hers,
then move it down to her waist,
pull her in close as we stand
face to face.
My nose brushes hers
with her freckles that dust it,
our lips interlock
parted just a little bit.
We pull apart
as the sun shines its last rays
then meander on home
the end to a perfect day.

Like jumping into an alpine lake
Of pure mountain runoff,
My senses are ignited
By icy fire,
Buzzing.
The gentle movement of your chest
Mirroring the the waxing and waning of the sea,
In
Out
The gentle breath of your hair,
Soft as the touch
Of a downy feather
Brushing my cheek,
The smell indescribable
And unique.
Strong legs intertwined
As we "sleep" the night away.

As my hands comb through my hair,
I stare between my knees
looking into the depths of this
unfamiliar wooden floor.
The foundation creaking
from the wind howling outside,
its feral cry
full of pent up emotions,
filling the night with chaos,
mirroring the landscape of my emotions.
Pictures so lovingly framed,
propelled by chaotic winds,
splash
into an unbroken lake
sending ripples scrambling away
as they try and escape the touch
of these cherished memories.
The golden light of a sunny day
spent laughing and crying
under pine trees,
shines from the depths.
The cold grey light of a rainy day
spent looking out the tear stained window
trying to make sense of this hurricane of emotions,
cuts through the inky black water.
The constellations of so many memories
seems just in reach
as I syphon this inky black water
through my pen,
drawing from the depths of my soul,
a straight IV
into these flatlining lines
of this black notebook
that holds my soul.

Some think the sunrise
happens all at once.
The sun bursts over the
edge of the earth
And suddenly golden rays
Shower the world!

They're wrong.
The sunrise happens slowly,
almost imperceptible.
The darknes starts to lose its edge.
The blackness goes from black to dark grey.
Then dark grey to light grey.
Until without noticing
you look around and you can see
clearly.
Then over the horizon
peaks the edge
Of the glowing, life bringing orb
that floats in our sky.
That's when the golden rays come,
and warm your very soul.

*You were like the sunrise

These joyful teardrops fall
Thousands and thousands of feet,
Falling through the shifting air currents,
warming as they approach the ground
That they are so determined to soften.
As these tears fall,
I dance.
Jumping and leaping,
Dreaming and laughing with no cares.
These tears fall on my bare skin,
Joyously painting their masterpieces
On my white canvas with translucent tracks.
Tracing the contours of my body,
Freely exploring these valleys and mountains,
For we are all free.
As I slide through the mud
No longer white or brown,
No longer Christian, Muslim, or Atheist,
No longer afraid or angry.
These tears wash away everything
As they fall to the ground,
From my cheeks and the sky.
Not a care for yesterday,
Not a worry about tomorrow.
As I lay still,
Allowing these tears to wash my body clean,
Mixing with the swirling brown water,
Telling a story,
It caresses my naked body.
It washes away my walls I have erected,
Laying bare once again my ever present
Love.
And as I look over,
I can almost see you lying beside me.
Your white teeth
Glinting as you stare back.
Not a moment of chagrin
As we lay here,
Bare ******* to the heavens.
Your deep brown eyes
Framed by a messy mane
Stare into mine.
But as I look back to the heavens
You fade away once more.

And as I lay there all alone,
I wish I could fall,
Thousands and thousands of feet,
Swirling through the air currents,
Onto your dancing and leaping body,
Caressing your cheeks,
Washing away your cares.
I fall onto your body
And as you look over
Your white teeth,
Glinting as I stare back.
Not a moment of chagrin
As we lay here,
Bare ******* to the heavens.
Your deep brown eyes,
Framed by a messy mane,
Stare into mine.
As you look to the heavens
I lay beside you,
Swirling around your body,
Washing the mud from your skin,
And the stains from your soul.

One short night
Opened the flood gates
For the first time in years,
Releasing the river of emotions
I had held back
To shield myself
From the pain of rejection...

Years of winter runoff
Pouring through my veins,
Igniting my every breath
With the drug called love.
A raging torrent,
Untamable and unstoppable.

*the flood gates are open

The tapping of a tiny drummer
Playing a mad tune
Calling all of life to dance
To jump and turn
To feel alive
And rejoice for all
For life is amazing
Spring, winter, summer, and fall
Though the sun may be hidden
We don't give a care
For what's there to be sad about
Life's in the air!

The call of the scrub jay
Plaintive in the silence of solitude.
The mountain before me that I must shift
Looms large as I take in my surroundings.
Song flows from my dry cracked lips
As I plead with the heavens for guidance.
My exertions drawing the moisture from my skin
And the strength from my limbs,
The walls of my last sanctuary start to crumble
As the dehydration sets in.
The last ray of sunlight fades,
And darkness sets in,
Mirroring my growing dread.
I lie in my nest
Throwing up final pleas
To the spirits of the world
To protect my nearly naked body.
The caress of cedar bows
Normally so comforting,
Now warding of the welcome respite of sleep.
Cold spreading over my body
As it slips through the earth,
Encompassing my body in its fatal grip.
My mind no longer reliable tells me
The end is near.
As my legs carry me back,
Back to the beginning,
Back on my commitment,
Back towards who I was,
The moisture I need so badly
Flows down my cheeks
As I accept defeat.
As I dismiss my bid for independence.

Eyes turned down,
Anger and disappointment flowing through my veins,
Anguish apparent on my tear stained face.
He looks at me with this look of love.
The same that had pushed me to this challenge.
The same that had always given me such confidence.
The same that I now felt like I didn't deserve.
As understanding flowed from his heart to mine,
My strength returned,
My confidence restored,
My will whole again.
Clarity and determination
Regained their hold over my mind,
Kicking the panic and excuses
From their tyrannical thrones.
The cold dark night ahead
Now no more worrying than a walk in a meadow
As i set off back to my temporary home.

Arms interlocking
A lock against all space and time
It holds us here
In a space
Free of our most limiting sense
Vision
Eyes closed I feel your chest
Rise and fall
Your hair tickles my nose
And caresses my lips
Painting images
In my mind
Of late nights under stars
And long days spent in woods
I hear your breath in my ear
Whispering like the ocean waves
Breaking over me
Taking me out to sea
The smell of your hair
Traces of a warm fire
Fueled by the limbs of our ancestors
The cedar trees coming to life in every aspect of you.
The memory of your lips pressed against mine
The taste of my tears as you left
And the joy when I found you again
As I open my eyes
Everything comes together
Into this beautiful goddess
But once again you slip
Past my finger tips
Into the wide world
To find another key
That fits your lock

This bottomless hole
                                     She slowly leaves behind,
                                                                                  It keeps growing

Meaningless* noises flow
From mouth
To mouth
Expressionless and
*Emotionless

With the touch of the glass
you shattered mine
the protective film that
made me believe we were invincible
gone
with one touch of a tiny blue button
you forced me to remember
a night in the dark
full of whispers
and gentle caresses
remember
with one excuse
you reminded me what love was
and removed the fetters that
previously bound me to you
*free

As i lie here
with my sword in hand,
I try to convey my feelings
without sounding cheesy.
But while my arm is getting tired
and my brain emptying,
my heart keeps beating,
trying to convey these feelings
into art that will take your breath away...
but these letters don't seem to want to arrange
in a pattern that is pleasing
to both the eye and the brain.
So while rain pounds
on the window pane
i will lie here trying to fight,
with a sword thats too heavy
...


So i will practice
until this sword weighs no more
then the pencil
held in my right hand.
I will write
until my heart
can beat no longer
for it has conveyed
all it has too say.

the rain on my window
                           mirrors the weather inside

Boredom is a disease
But it is easily curable
For all you need
Is an imagination
And nowhere to be

Have you ever read a really good series. Where it almost seems like your one of the characters. But then you get to the end of the series and there's nothing else to read. And then you feel a little bit depressed, and since it was such a big part of your life you kinda don't know what to do anymore ... Yeah that's me :/

Why do my paper
When theres better things to do
Like dreaming of you