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  Feb 2019 Rahama
fearfulpoet
“only” the lonely know (my special sign)

{=}

an incurable silence

the meaningless, wasted touch of a hand,
attached, directed by them from them
to them
a failed reassurance

a classroom, a stadium, cornfield or grove,
so many nutted fallen solitaries fallen to rot
midst a globe of trillions never noticed,
never missed

the silly conceptual that the lonely,
special unique, blessed with a curse,
a specialist status, “only” they afflicted;
with a ken that isolates and yet feels elevated -
oh! I am special

show me one, just one, human who doesn’t truly believe,
they are the onliest loneliest and you will vision
each and every
lonely person who
secret sighs and whose first thoughts are only:

god spare me one more day of being,
fearful of achieving
my very own knowing,
in the invisible place,
the incurable silence award,
reward of another purple heart,
“only” the lonely service ribbon,
my Cain marker

~my special sign~
WOW

what a wonderful reception to my first poem!

thank you,
less fearful!
Rahama Jan 2019
I was alone last night,
When the news came in.
My heart pounded,
I was excited.
My prayer had been answered -
One of them was.
I was filled with joy,
It overflowed -
With tears,
Laughter.
I was glad,
Nothing could spoil my mood.

But then comes another.
A knife stabbed in my heart.
I didn't want to see,
Didn't want to believe.
But ignorance can't be feigned,
When the truth has been seen.
I want to cry,
But the tears won't come.
All I feel is that pain,
While everything else is numb.

I found joy;
I found pain.
I gained a want;
I lost a friend.
The joy will pass;
He won't return again.
I'd like to not receive news again.
I lost a friend
Rahama Jan 2019
I expected disappointment,
And I wasn't disappointed.
My only expectation;
Was for you to fumble;
To lose your way;
And you didn't let me down.
Rahama Dec 2018
To the one I love
That my words have hurt
I apologize
It's not my fault.
I probably didn't think them through
I honestly never meant them to
Be like knives to you
I'm sure the hurt you felt
Distinguished the light in your eyes
Even for a moment
And I sincerely apologize.
It's not something I tend to do
I don't derive pleasure from seeing you
Hurt and fragile
In denial
Fighting with your demons
With blank stares and glazed eyes.
I never meant to cause you pain
But I know I did
Cause something flashed in your eyes
The moment the words escaped my lips without a second thought
I recognize the hatred in your gaze
It made me sick.

I'm so sorry.
Rahama Dec 2018
Do you feel my love;
Leave me to embrace you?
Merry Christmas ❤
  Dec 2018 Rahama
Raven
There's a forest in my soul
The leads to my heart

There is many things in the forest
Most
If not all
Are hidden

To reach my heart you must make it through

You must make it past
The forgetting paths
They often forget where they are supposed to go

You must make it past
The clingy wolfs
Sometimes they forget how far
Is too far

You must make it past
The overthinking bears
For they'll pin you down in a death like grip
But then stay there
For they start to overthink

Last
But not least

You must make it across
Lust lake
For sometimes
Depending on the way I act
It can drown you
In temptation
August/6/2018
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