Standing on the edge of despair
my life spiraling out of control
I call out to the one above
who knows me better than I know myself
Spiritually down I called to the upmost high
Asking the Lord for his grace and mercy
Drained I go bout my day my shoulders a lot lighter
already feeling burdens being lifted
Letting him do his will realizing I couldnt do it by myself
When I let go and let God
Things in my life started changing for the better
Things begin to make since again
Doors opened that I thought were closed to me
As I praised and gave thanks to the one who made it possible
I looked at my life and determined
the reason why things are the way they were
I had lost my way and my faith had waivered
Not doing the things I knew i needed to do
with out prayer and work I was allowing the devil
to dictate my life with chaos and confusion
Leaving destruction in my path
As I look back on my life recognizing all the miracles
and things that he had his hand in
Reconfirming that God can do all things.

Thinking about you in every word

Your hair...

Your lips...

Your smile...

and your eyes...

Thinking that you are

Caring...

Thoughtful...

Respectful...

and wise...

I love the way you

walk...

the way you talk...

the way you say my name...

There are days that I

Miss you...

Desire you...

Care for you...

and love you...

I sometimes sit and wonder if you

Are thinking of me.....

My life is in shambles

Stress taking over my life

the constant drinking trying to drown

this feeling hoping with this false

courage that can deal

Tired of being angry

Tired of being sad

Tired of crying, tear ducts depleted

I can't breathe or sleep

Everything is in turmoil

Feeling helpless there is no easy fix

Exhausted from all this pain, misery and heartache

Temper flairing at the most minut things

Can't seem to catch a break

Everything is falling apart all around me

This is more than I can handle

My stability is being rocked

Rocked to the core

The scorching fire heats up your soul

The flame the color of red, orange and blue

Water its enemy and wood its food source

A beautiful thing can be so powerful

and destructive at the same time

The fire travels through the forest

making a path in its wake

Burning everything in sight to ashes

Making the animals who are fast run for their lives

The unfortunate ones burn to a crisp in howling rage

When its all over the forest is left to its own devices

To pull itself together

To start over again in its circle of life

As another fire stats in the city

Burning its 5 story home in its fiery grave

Having no remorse the battle wages on between fire and water

Each putting up a good fight to the very end

When water conquers all in its victory

The sky is cloudy then gradually turns black

No stars or mmon in the sky

In the distance you see

A streak of light across the sky

Followed by a booming sound

The air still with humidity

Reminding me when i was little

How my mother used to explain to me

About how the Greeks Gods were fighting

Then God started crying big drops of tears

The winds picked up howling like a child

in pain with each gust

The lights on the tower twinkling in the distance

wanting the comfort of my momma's body heat

I crept in the bed with her

Her soft voice as she reassured me everything

Will be okay answering my questions as

a mother would to her daughter

Sheltering me from this harsh world

As I grew up realize that a storm wasn't

Just the weather but goes on in life

The turmoil, the clash between negative and positive

The good and the bad



QNA

As the waves lull you to sleep
A sudden noise raises you but of your dreams
And then you spot a breaching whale
that feels you with aspiration
The waves lapping at your boat making
a rhythm that is music to your ears
The saltiness in the air making your lips chapped
The wind whipped all around you
Making a thundering sounds on your sails
The sound of the ocean brings tears to your eyes
How could something so peaceful and tranquil be full of music
Donning scuba gear you prepare to swim with the fishes
But once down there nothing prepares you for what you see
The ocean is so blue and then so green at the same time
A sight that takes your breath away
Time lapse while you're swimming this colorful world
Seeing many beautiful creatures in their truest form
Then to your left you see what you've never thought you would be able to see
Two dolphins and a baby swimming behind a school of fishes
You experience what people only dream about complete serenity

QNA

Brow beaten and body bent shoulders tense

With a headache in the midst

Dragging, you push through the day

Your only thought is of a soft bed awaiting your arrival

Awaiting the feel of comfort to wrap its self around you

The prospect of a soak in a hot bubble bath

helps you get through the day

You can picture it, salt beads with candles lit all around

Melting in the water along with your problems soothing your aching body

As your worries disappear with each breathe

Your mind travels back to the troubles of the day

Thanking God that its all over

And you start fresh the next day

Happy to be at home in your safe enviroment

You slip into your most comfortable pj's

And curl yourself up with a good book to wind down

The pressures of the day tucked in for the night



QNA

I see many things

I see the good and the bad

The hard times and the wonderful times

As I leaf through the newspaper

I see a world of chaos

The war overseas is destroying our lives

I see people dying, lying, cheating and stealing

In our country the very place we call home

Satan is in our mist

The devil has got his horns on this world

And won’t let loose

And I’m just sitting here waiting

Waiting on the other shoe to drop

I look around me and I wonder

What this world is becoming to

Judgment day is nipping at the back of our heels

And were not ready

Were to occupied with crime, punishment and greed

We don’t even bother to look up and take notice

It’s like we have shields on our eyes

Blocking that 6th sense we are supposed to have

Our instinct is no longer there

Foreign to our minds

Decapitated from our thoughts

QNA

The dry heat takes your breath away
Leaving you struggling to draw life into your lungs
Sweat dripping off your brow
The sun beaming hot on your back
Miles and miles of sand with nothing else in sight
Make your wish of home
But even the draught there is an unseen beauty there
The peace and quiet tranquility pour over you
A motion in the corner of your eye catches your attention
You see an iguana born to live on this dry forsaken land
Its fast movements scurrying over the sand amuses you
There is a cactus with a gorgeous flower bloomed on its prickly skin
You are but oh so beautiful
The snake slithering leaving amazing marks behind in its haste in the sand
Then a torrent wind brings a sense of being over you cooling you off for just brief moment
But when the sunsets the nights are cool
Sitting around the fire letting your thoughts drift over the wonders of the world

QNA

Undiscovered
Unconquered
and untampered with
Pure as the snow on the highest caps
No worries
no drama
no situation
no problems that she can call her own
Ducking and dodging the vultures
that can smell her innocence
Wanting to be the first to claim
She moves on knowing her worth
and will not settle for less
They yell after her with no respect
but she does not mind she don't have the time
or patience for such vulgarity
Now 18 with her virtue safe and sound
She has things to do
life to conquer

Out on her own a sheltered child
she face the big world with dreams and ambition
Not knowing about the wolves in sheep clothing
that she will meet along the way
She meet a man who befriended her
made her feel safe in this crazy world
Took her in, in a city where she knew no one
Took care of her bought her everything
she ever needed or wanted
Her whole life was this man
her savior in her eyes, the love of her life
She made a decision to giver her one true gift to him
and that was her virginity
The day of the gift giving she set everything up
so it would be special
Told him that she had a surprise for him
but what she didn't know he had a surprise waiting for her

It started off as planned but then his whole demeanor altered
to a man she didn't know
He got rough with her
Hitting and chocking her
Before she knew it 3 men appeared
before her like they were on stand by
A night she would always remember
they ravashed and spoiled her
used her like a wet rag
A night of pain and humiliation
With film to capture this horrible moment
The man she loved and believed in
turned out to  be a snake/a monster

He started controlling her every move
said she had to pay him back
for everything he ever did for her
He tricked her out to hundreds of men
Threatened to **** her if she ever left
With no hope for a better life
She turned to drugs to dull the pain and anguish
Now an abused prositute crack *****
Abused in every form she thinks the only way out
is in the form of death

After 4 years of heartache and misery she finally had enough
She made the decision to give the last special gift, her life
The day of the gift giving she set everything up so it would be special
She wrote her last words and went to sleep
He found her the next morning in the tub surrounded by burnt down candles
Od'd on her drug of choice
with both wrist slit
She wanted to be sure
He read her final goodbyes
With her life in his hands the monster spiraled out of controlled
it haunted him til he couldnt take it no more
and ended his torment in a cloud of gunsmoke

QNA

The prince of darkness
So subtle in his light
In awe by men
Wanting to conquer its beauty
A mystery to us all
its caraters tell of stories untold
its many phases from crescent to call
Completes the dark skies
It hides a great tale maybe of
Life unknown to man
Many visit to this planet
Always end the same
Clueless to its greatness
The planet with no gravity
And no oxygen so different
From our own world
Cause so many try to understand its way of life

QNA

Darkness clouds your mind
Not understanding the process of right and wrong
The beast within you consuming your very soul
Leaving a empty vessel
Going through life with no meaning
Faith in nothing but pain suffering and chaos
Living for the thrill of the hunt
Living for the moment to concur
The devil your master no hope for the light of day

All alone in this cold black abyss
Solitude your comfort zone
No one to understand you at all
Alone in your cruel world that you created for yourself
Twisted thoughts consume your every waking hour
Strong compulsions to inflict
Terror or pain in the hearts of others
In a state of diminished mental capacity
You go alone to hell and bring back others
Leaving destruction in your path

I see many things
I see the good and the bad
The hard times and the wonderful times
As I leaf through the newspaper
I see a world of chaos
The war overseas is destroying our lives
I see people dying, lying, cheating and stealing
In our country the very place we call home
Satan is in our mist
The devil has got his horns on this world
And won’t let loose
And I’m just sitting here waiting
Waiting on the other shoe to drop
I look around me and I wonder
What this world is becoming to
Judgment day is nipping at the back of our heels
And were not ready
Were to occupied with crime, punishment and greed
We don’t even bother to look up and take notice
It’s like we have shields on our eyes
Blocking that 6th sense we are supposed to have
Our instinct is no longer there
Foreign to our minds
Decapitated from our thoughts

Somebody’s watching…
The heat of a glare bouncing against your back
Following every move every step you make
Sending shivers down your spine

Somebody’s watching you…
Waiting on you to make a mistake
So they can pick up where you left off
And leave you with his foot in your face

Somebody’s watching…
Sit up and take notice
Watch your back
Cause their just waiting to take your place
Move in your space
Leaving you too tired to pick up the pace

Somebody’s watching…
Taking notes
Dictating what you do and what you don’t
Learning your fears and your weaknesses
Watching, waiting…
Patiently waiting to get beneath your skin
To find out what makes you tick
Cause their only there to win

Caught in the system
No where to run No where to hide
The law more our foe then friend

Our young mothers
Caught in the welfare system
Not able to get out
Before getting ****** in to the governments game
Trying to beat the system
Not aware that the system is beating them

Our sons getting caught up
In the street system
Being stereo-typed and classified
To fit their own beliefs
Being harassed by our Police officers
who are supposed to protect and serve
But instead think they
Are above the law
The judge, jury and the executioner

This world that we live in
Is full of chaos and destruction
Not only chased by our district cops
But by devious gangsters
That think they own the streets
Growing up in a world
Of drugs, crime and greed
Money the ruler of all evil

Our sons getting shipped of
To fight a war that they don’t believe in
Fighting for a man that doesn’t have
our best interest at heart

Our daughters living in a world of
material things and money
taking the saying *** sells literally
the times have changed
Girls are the aggressive ones now
Seeing what they want and going for it
Anything goes at any and all cost
Shame…

In the midst of it all
Losing face, self respect and common sense
Shaking what our mothers took 9 months to make
Showing our self-loath with the clothes they wear
Putting it down to not being ashamed of our bodies and being free

In actually reality we have imprisoned ourselves in our minds
Diluting this life we call freedom repeating our past
Not knowing that our failures today are our failures tomorrow
The system is designed to entrap and snare
To detain and restore
To be lost and forgotten and never thought of again no more

Silent as the storm
Black as the nights sky
You never know when its coming
Temperature ranging from hot to cold
Moon swings come and they go
She can make you feel like the lowest **** on earth
Or make you feel like a King

We are in a league of our own
The take no mess take charge kind of woman
Sweet as honey beautiful as the sunset
She’ll drain you and leave you begging for more
With her smooth complexion hair just right
Dress to impress and the legs smooth as silk
Her take charge attitude with sophistication
Can work the room in any situation
Wither in the boardroom, fancy restaurant
or at home with family and friends

She can cut you down without missing a beat
Leave you standing there wondering what happen
A work of art in her own right
A independent women but can make you feel
Like you are needed always treating you like you the man
A way with words that will leave no room argument
Will cut so deep leave you grasping for breath
But you can never want to hurt this woman
Cuz she can turn on you like Cain turn on Abel

We are devious creatures and with a devious mind
And a women who is scorn is a dangerous combination
A woman with so much confidence
It will make you sit up and take notice
But at the same time she knows her place
As a women by your side
While all the while bringing home the bacon, cook it and serve it to you like royalty

Watch out cause she’s on the rise
As a strong independent black woman
Never fearing of the two strikes against her
In this mans world that we live in
So watch out, take notice and pay attention because she is unstopable