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Khairah Afellay May 2015
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah."

"Are you sure?"
"Uhuhm."

"You don't look alright."
"I am."

"What happened?"
"Nothing."

"You sure?"
"Yeah."

"Hmm okay"
"Alright."

So who is pity? The one seeking pity but not wanting it or the one trying to be pitiful but doesn't truly care?
Don't ask questions if you don't truly care.
Khairah Afellay Feb 2015
As I skimmed through the texts that were long forgotten,
I sit and think how it all went wrong.
And now every time we meet again,
I can never really look you in the eye.

If people were to ask, what's the best memory of us,
I would say,
It was the long bus ride that we took and you sharing your tunes.
We sit in silence as we slowly fall into a slumber, it could never be more peaceful.

Till now I couldn't find a reason,
Why God led me to you
I'm pretty sure you're a life lesson,
Of how to let go and come out of the blue.
Khairah Afellay Jan 2015
I've always considered myself like a grenade,
Capable of blowing everything in my path into pieces.
I have yet to find someone who would stay,
When things get complicated.

Why is it too difficult for me to understand?
Am I incapable of showing care?
I confide everything in myself,
Reluctant to let anything out, I'm afraid it will leave such mess.

That's why it's better for me to be alone,
Distancing myself from the people I could hurt.
Saving everyone from the deadly blow,
Run everyone run, I'll let you go.
Khairah Afellay Jan 2015
“Why did you leave me like that?”

“Because I feel worthless.”

“What do you mean?”

“Like a speck of dust in the whole wide universe, I make no impact. I can’t change anything more in your life, people have made you happier than I could have and your past is much better than your future with me. I’m not the best for you, we are too different yet almost similar and the way you love me is never the same as how you loved the others before me. You don’t show it but I can feel it and before I hurt myself even further, I shall leave you like we never met.”
Khairah Afellay Jan 2015
******* what did I just say,
I'm pretty sure now it was a fatal mistake .
Blinded by the drug that's sipping through my bloodstream,
You're halfway out the door, God help me please.

Forgive me my darling,
I'm on my knees begging
Because if you were to leave me tonight,
It will be a flatline with defeaning beeps.
Khairah Afellay Jan 2015
Ever met someone new and think:
"Wow, this person will drive me crazy."
A thunderstorm on a clear blue day.
Turning your entire life upside down, inside out.

And you want to jump in,
You still want to risk it.
Because getting to know them is like adventure,
An adventure that you crave for.
Khairah Afellay Feb 2015
And then I realized,
The only way for me to be happy again,
No matter how painful,
Was to let you go.
Khairah Afellay Jan 2015
It ***** to realise
That all these feelings will be left untold,
And will be kept till all of eternity
Because we are not meant to be.

It breaks my heart knowing you will walk down the isle one day,
But not with me.

— The End —