another night without you
the pain inside burns
it burns almost more then the alcohol i consume
drinking to try and forget everything
everything i cant be because the feeling of reject
the feeling of regret
the feeling of the love i wont ever get
i had plans
plans for the future
future with you, a house, kids

now when you run through my mind i feel sick
i get nervous
my stomach flips
i cant sit straight because i get an awkward feeling
because i know you don't want me back
my eyes glaze
tears run down my face
but i have no emotion
i feel no pain

sometime i think if i tried a little harder you would have left
but i know if all you wanted was more effort that's what you would have said
you would have told me that you need a little more love
a longer message before bed
i gave you all that
i gave you everything i had

i didn't have a job
neither did you
but when i got money it would go straight to us
dates, dinner, snacks for the nights that we spent alone
just me and you

now i have a job
i have money
but no you
i go to the movies
i go for dinner
i buy snacks
by myself, without you
i see movies i know you'd like
even if i know i wouldn't

I'm pathetic for being so ******* upset
i realize everyday that its life
that one day ill have love again
but late at night as soon as i lay down to rest
as soon as my body hits my bed
its like my blanket is full of memories we once had
no matter who i love in the future
or who loves me
you'll always be my first
you'll always have the biggest part of me