Oh no, I didn'tstagram
Don't want to share my selfies
Don't want you to know what I ate last night
Or what I did on Roofies

I twitter at your followers
And no, I won't "Follow you back"
The only people I'll re-tweet, my dear
Have all the things you lack

Won't go in One Direction
So hate on me, make a fuss
Don't think they'll oust the Beatles
Just because Harry does

Oh, what's a SnapChat?
Don't think I have that
Oh wait a minute, I don't care
Cos that app's neither here nor there

Don't think I'll find an online mister
Or reply to a "How about we.."?
Yes, I'm cyber challenged
So said my little sister

Everyone's a super model
But I mistrust Facebook photos
You probably photo-shopped your flaws
Or whitened your teeth with risottos

#nofilter equals #somanyfilters
Enough with all the fake
Because in this unreal world
This is more than I can take

So, take a step back
Post a candid shot
Don't hang around for them likes
Show them what you've really got

Make it stop.