I'm still scared
That I'm going to **** myself
I still cannot take baths
With candle light

Burning incense
To clear my head
And the water's too hot
Numbing my body

Stuffy air
That makes my eyes water

Remembering that night

I cannot submerge my head
Underwater
In case I decide
I do not want to surface
again

I could take all the drugs in the world
get high as a kite
Trying to feel something
more than this

This nothingness
Goes deeper than
Beneath my skin
I am dead inside