I can’t see them anymore I don’t want to see them anymore I have no desire to see them anymore
I never think about phoning them or messaging them or stopping by to say “hi.”
I don’t care about what’s happening in their lives or who they’re dating or what memories we had together
yet they insist, they demand that I visit them that I sit down with them that I talk about nothing important with them
and I can’t say no
because I know how it feels:
during those times, when I was down and out and needed someone to turn to, to talk to but there was no one around I felt the terror & the darkness constricting my cold and lonely heart as all the vitality and connection was draining from my ventricles of ire like blood from a stone
and so much of that over a lengthy period of time has made me a lot stronger, more independent from people and maybe even borderline aloof from all human interaction
I no longer need them I no longer want them around
but I can’t let anyone feel that same way that I felt