Some poems don't work. No amount of tweaking will fix it. You can't finger it until it comes.
Push the delete button and start over. You write because you have to. It's in your cells.
You're a salmon, swimming up stream to stay alive. You write because the nuthouse yawns, and beckons. It waits.
The cage door is open, and the water is tainted with mercury. Fly away, or die.
If the writing isn't working, go fishing, eat a tangerine or some brussel sprouts. Be livid Be silly. Study the ***** and the orchid.
Think about what the color black tastes like, or if pink whispers or yells. And write until the trivialities take flight from your life. In the surrendering, triumph will come.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w2RTVZcWtVM&t=12 Check out my you tube channel where I read my poetry.