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Dec 2021
[x] Denial: i ran to the ends of the earth to get some answers. Death was the only response I received. No! That didn’t happen! Leave me alone!

- [x] Anger: why am I cursing your name in these recycling bins? I hate you with all my being! I’m so glad I don’t have to see you. I hope you rot like a corpse in the dying cemetery.

- [x] Bargaining: please, I’ll stop wining if I get her back. I won’t complain anymore; I won’t dare act put out. I’ll respond to her old texts or emails or whatever. I’ll do anything...

- [x] Depression: my bones are aching. I can’t hold myself upright. In fact- I hate myself. I gag watching my reflection in the mirror. If you stopped liking me, who can love me now? I used to admire the ripples in the stream, but now I punch the water and cry until my hands are pruny. It’s not healthy, but I’m hopeless and nothing can fix me.

- [ ] Acceptance: yesterday I thought of you and I didn’t frown. I smiled bittersweetly, cause you are gone still, but it’s over. You were a fabulous friend for all those years. I won’t forget that. I’ll let go of the sorrow and the years we spent together. I’ll walk the way of the weather vane and dry my tears in the light of the sun. Thank you for the moments and goodbye my old solider.
I lost you
Are these the right stages of grief?
What’s wrong with me?
louella
Written by
louella  18/F/wherever you are
(18/F/wherever you are)   
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