Despite my past
soaked so heavily in red
I want my hands to wash free
of all the mistakes I've made
to have you read them in the ***** water
going down the drain
as I scrub under my nails
for the last drop of my sins.

I want you to know me,
to see all that I have done
to feel all the horror of me
and still, choose to stay.
I want you to know what you're getting
yourself in to
but love me anyway.

I'm tired of being pushed aside
by those I would sacrifice everything for
I want someone to see
all the hideous parts of me
and not be disgusted
as others have been
I want you to be committed
to loving me,
to making it work,
no matter the challenges.

I feel my walls crumbling down,
all you do is put your hands
against the outside
and they start to fall
I was so
unprepared for you
unhinged by you at first
you made yourself at home in my heart
so quickly
no alarm had time to sound
there was never an option
for me to not love you
I never could have stopped myself
from falling for you
you're a dream come true,
an angel if I ever did see one.

I would not be surprised
if I had known you
before this lifetime-
if I had loved you
in each case of my existence
this feels so right,
like I'm finally arriving home.
You are my warmth,
my safety,
my comfort,
my happiness.
My love for you will never cease
nor diminish
it will only grow stronger
as the years pass by.

And I hope for us to have
many years
time enough for me to learn
and love
and cherish
each and every inch of you
time enough for me to show you
how worthy
and beautiful
and special
you really are.

This love of ours
was built to last.