I miss looking out my sky-light star gazing,
Surrounded by the warm glow of candlelight,
Long shadows curling up my walls and over me,
Snuggling close, encasing and tucking me in,
While I fell asleep to the flickering light, blazing.
I miss the sound of comfortable silence,
And the familiarity it could bring me,
Without the chaos and turmoil of my family,
Unraveling in delicate daisies and ambiance.
I miss the feeling of burning wispy jasmine,
Watching the thin lines pierce the air clearly,
As white smoke surrounded and encased me,
I felt free as a bird with all it's grace and beauty.
I miss the edge of my bed; the corners of my bookcase,
Each book containing a different piece of my heart,
How I could re-read them, discover new loving parts,
Escaping reality, swept off the road, leaving no trace.
I miss being able to sit in the moment of my first kiss,
Confidence coming from God knows, I reached over,
Stumbling and fumbling in that cold evening in October,
How I was full of naivety, awkwardness and ignorant bliss.
I miss my old CD's and my prehistoric stereo,
The simplicity of changing albums physically,
Singing along to those old emo songs joyously,,
They were my lifeline, more than I'll ever know.
I miss the lock on my door and the clunky key,
The one time I lost it and had to pay for a locksmith,
The chipped corners from my teenage adolescence,
How it kept me locked away- secluded I was free.
I miss the makeshift and haphazardly made carpet,
The memory of my mother laying it over cold cement,
Making do with little money, but still making it *****,
It was my makeshift carpet and one I'd never forget.
I miss my childhood teddy, one that I didn't even name,
How he would fall down in the dead of night suddenly,
Startling! Yet comforting as I hugged him into me warmly,
Despite not knowing his name, I loved him all the same.
I miss my PlayStation Four and all the friends I made,
My best-friends despite only knowing their usernames,
The adventures we went onto together playing games,
"One more game, one more round-Is it 3am? Another raid!"
I miss those childhood sleepovers with my best mates,
Before the labels, the social cliques and exclusivity,
Where we ate pizza, played Pokemon, thought positively,
Before we all drifted apart, to different schools and classmates.
I miss my childhood home sometimes..