Through my own tyrannical enforcement I spew insipid scripted statements I do not support nor enjoy. Afraid to be aberrant Oppressed I am pushed to lecture repugnant contradictions against my own disposition. Turgid loathing of the fear of dropping the expected facade Supported by ego and enforced by group-think to mold a homogenous majority. I hate self pity. Here marinating in my own self indulgent sorrow. I am a hypocrite. Another one of my enemies. But weakened by forcing myself to state the opposite of what I value, I open myself to further self destruction. Through this introspection I might be able to reclaim my social autonomy. Possibly at the cost of diminution of social impression. That is held at such divine standards today. I might become a social martyr. But at least I’d die complete and confident in my own voice. It would open me to ridicule. But I’d rather understand myself and be subjected to hate than to live objectively in a self confined contrived reality.