I realized tonight
While I laid in what use to be our bed
I realized that your voice
has left my memory.

I can't hear it anymore
Not like I use to.
I can't remember it
I kept trying so desperately to remember

What did it sound like?
Any of it
when you laughed
or even cried.
What sleepy noises did you use to make?

I can still see your smile,
thank God I can still see it
I can see the crooked grin
but I can't hear you.

You're beginning to fade
I don't know how to stop it.
I don't know how to memorialize
every part of you.

You're drifting away
I thought I could hold on for eternity.
I thought for sure I’d keep every bit of you
Locked away in my memory
I was wrong.

You see we’re human
And humans forget
I'm so scared one day
I will wake up and
you'll just be gone.

You've been gone
4 years now
I don't want anymore
of you to leave me.

I will not,
I can not survive that.

I squeeze my eyes as tight as possible
Hoping that the memory
of your hand on my thigh
will come back

Hoping I can still feel the feeling
of you fingers laced with mine...
It's gone.
I can't remember how rough the felt.

I can't remember
the exact shade of green
your eyes held
I have lost the smell in the air of
when you first got out of the shower.

I still remember
it use to be my favorite moment
First thing in the morning
but now it's disappeared
with so many other things.

It’s losing you all over again
I don't know how to stop it,
stop you from becoming
a fictional time in my life.

You were real,
We were real.
You loved me.
You loved me so much
I know you did

There are people
People in my life now,
that have never heard your name.
That never knew us...

People that have only known me
Without you.
How is that possible?
Who even am I without you?
Just a casing of who I use to be?
A hollow person with nothing to give?
These people don't even know
They don't know me at all.