i asked you the meaning of your name
and you said it means
the stalk of a lotus.
i think of all the times you bloomed before me,
thriving despite the negativity.

i didn't know what compassion meant
until i met you,
as i raged, wept and cried in despair,
you waited and held my hand.
i had forgotten what vulnerability meant
until i met you.
you showed me that we often love the wrong people,
we often show them the sides of us they never wanted to see.

the lawns of the school of economics
hold the memory of us bonding
over broken hearts and broken knees.
we laughed when our insides were breaking,
we tried to heal each other's wounds,
hoping that our words would be of some comfort for scars
left by former lovers.

we learnt how bad unrequited love hurts together.
when the spring arrived, i cried over a boy who never loved me.
you cried over a man who pretended to love you.
the commuters on the train may have overheard us maundering
did grief bring us closer?

i remember the sound of your laughter
during our phone calls.
i probably said something about my ex and his small *****,
your ex and karma. oh and our discussions on karma,
i can't wait till she gets me.

i remember when you held me tight
and promised me that it was going to be okay.

with time,
i have learnt to let go of certain memories
but i know i won't let go of you.