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Feb 2018
I don't know what to label you
As everything in my life has a place
You stand in between the lines of friend and boyfriend.
It's really ******* with my head
Now as I said before
We can't be a couple
Rather, an admirer
Who lives two hours away
But will come knocking at your door
When inquired
I don't know what to tell you
When I took you to the beach
The cops showed up
And we ran, from red and blue
Lights that lit up the sea
And upon your window sat a fat parking ticket
I felt bad because you were sad that we missed it,
The fact, of course
That we couldn't be parked there anymore.

Silence on the way back to my house
And I still don't know what to call you
As I rub your neck,
The back of your head
I think I should calm you

Should I kiss you?
Should I say sorry?
Maybe you're not picking up what I'm putting down
Maybe you're too selfish to notice my pout

Another song to shut the **** up to
It reminds me of the butterflies David gave me when he would drive me home just to f*ck me ******* my futon after my dance show.
It reminded me of the fights before sociology class in the parking lot of school and pretending everything was cool, it's all in the past.
He ******* played that song like it was fresh strawberry cheesecake every time he heard it
I wanted to scream and thrash and cry and complain and I wanted to burn it
Those songs,
No matter the message
Will always be negative
Because they remind me of a more handsome, more ******* of a boyfriend.
He liked Kendrick Lamar.
Written by
ivy  F
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