"Hello, how are you?"
I say in a voice I can't believe is mine.
I hate it so much.
It's become like nails on a chalkboard to my ears.

I ask the human in front of me,
"What can I get you today?"
They ignore me.
Finally someone approaches.

It's an older lady,
gray bushy hair with wild eyes.
I smile and begin to take her order.
She begins to make rude remarks towards me.

She leaves,
someone else approaches.
It's a man angry about a price I did not set.
He takes it out on me.

I take all of the verbal punches.
From people who have had their worst days,
to people who are just too privileged to give a little kindness,
I smile through it all.

I don't really think anyone who walks in,
really sees me as a human being.
They don't see that I fight social anxiety for a living,
or that I go through things too.

They don't care.
They don't want to care.
When they ask how I am,
they don't want an honest answer.

I wonder if they would smile,
or compliment me instead of insulting me,
if I weren't standing behind a counter,
taking orders and giving change.