i used to wish i was dead
i used to wish everything was dead
i wanted to leave
in anger
i wanted there to be a riot
i wanted people to realize what they had done
i wanted people to realize what i had done
i wanted them to read my note
i wanted to sleep
and not wake up
i would watch sad movies
and cry
id be happy that i was sad
i enjoyed being sad
it was a sickness
it was my control
it was my freedom
something i can finally do for myself
watch sad things to make myself more sad
and it worked
and that made me happy