You don't heighten me,
You don’t enlighten me,
Brighten me,
Or even give it right to me,
Not really,
Not like I want you to,
You don’t teach nor reach,
In to my mind or my soul,
Where exclusive intricacies evolve and grow
Assisting in growth, learning the ropes, intrigued by the whole of me

I’m uninspired,
Feel undesired
Stuck in my thoughts, I’m mindlessly wired
I don’t even know who you are and you know little of me, so it seems

I crave you
And degrade me in return
My ego yearns
For this empty,
Worthless gratification,
You provide no real satisfaction,
At this self lit cremation

But while I’m writing you reply and my brain and body collide, heating me inside
A rush, a drug? A quick fix,
A toxic dump for an insecurity slump
I wish I didn’t desire that heavy thud of my heart
With the throw of a dart
Anxiety starts
All over again