as a kid, I was excellent at mathematics
& decided 7 was my lucky number
due to it's being prime, a number
that did not fit or divide evenly with anything,
as it was for me with friends--

i've skipped day seven
and find it interesting that
with time, i'm now drawn more to 8,
the infinite purpose and divinity
found in the ability to continue on
despite the odds,
a finite existence turned mystical
as the lion of Strength
closes his mouth
and does not speak his needs this day--

the wispy spider whispers in my ear
the secrets to eternity,
this obtuse circling of a star that has long passed
i wonder what my purpose is--

i wish i was not so aggressive with you,
my need for your improvement haunts me
as i want to be held and comforted
as i've never known, a feeling i've tasted
and long for deeply--

us humans are not taught to love ourselves,
to really nurture our own hearts
& minds, to know what is is we seek
to the furthest reaches of the galaxies,
we settle, don't question, don't find

& i want more--