Being so close yet further than we were in distance
2. I know it's your sale on Saturday which I was waiting to be a part of for a year now but now I won't even know about it or how many cupcakes you'll make or how they tasted
3. I know things might get ok soon...they always do but until they don't...I'm aware of the bitter things that'll grow in your heart
4. You won't even show up to see me even if it's the last time
5. I'll regret the decision I made that night even though I didn't mean it and it wasn't such a big deal so the chaos after that will never make sense
6. It kills me more to know that you'll regret the decision you made that night even more and the one you made next morning too.
7. You'll never consider the amount of effort I put to bring you back....you might never understand how much I tried
8. Knowing that in 5 days 3 people would've left you and 1 of them is me and I'm the the only one who you actually kicked out of your life too... 5 3 1 ...I know you hate odd numbers
9. I might have to spend a lifetime waiting for you and waiting to find out why you were so excited about the gifts you got me which I ofcourse never received and you threw some of the things away too
10. You might make another very hasty decision that will **** you later as much as it'll **** me now and I can't do anything but hope for you to be patient and not leave earlier
11. I love the memories and the memoirs but they'll eventually **** me if this is how it is to end.
12. We might never share the same bed wrapped in each other's arms shaking in pleasure and that is something I can't have with anyone but you
13. The fact that last night I had enough in me to put my dad's gun to my head and eventually pull the trigger too....only to hear the clack of an empty gun and I can't stop but wish it had a bullet and hope that maybe next time it will
I could keep this list going and I'd say "come back" but I won't cuz the more I say it the further away you go