fire;
engulfed by a heat
that wasn't man made.
a heat that burns
worse than a burn
or a cut
drowned in alcohol.
a desire to feel pain
a desire to feel nothing.
but a breath,
but a pulse,
but the warmth of a touch.
but feeling is nothing.
it was a drug
and these are just
withdraw symptoms.
and one day
the feeling will return
but not today.
today i am burning
without turning to ash.
today i am
a fire
that can only
be put out
by her.