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Heaven Ladder (Or However I Can Get There)
I have a confession.
I am not a good person.
I know it isn't original, and I know you've heard this too many times from too many broken people.
But it's the only shred of honesty I can give so please accept it...
Because I do not know how to forgive myself for this tower of lies I built over the last month and a half.
I am not a good friend.
And you know I try. But I haven't been trying as hard as I used to.
But I want to try and make things right.
I have convinced myself that heaven seems too high up for me to get to.
And I'm here asking you to tell me there is still a chance for me to be saved from my life.
I went to church today for the first time in months.
I saw old friends, and read new verses... I learned more.
Although I still feel like an outcast in this place we call "safe".
I can't feel your presence near me even when I pray.
It's like I've cut the communication lines and there is no repairing them.
I am willing to work for my life.
I will build houses of faith and sing praises until I drop, but it won't be enough.
I work well under pressure. So if you told me that getting to heaven was as simple as building a ladder as high as I could in 24 hours, I would work through war and hellfire to get there.
I would climb every rung until the ladder ended above the clouds and started feeling like the solid foundation of a life restarted.
I can only hope you will accept me with open arms, forgiveness...
And a "hello."
I've been working too hard.
F/My Music Studio
(F/My Music Studio)
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