Stuff may happen but I don't understand.
I don't know why they talk to me,
I don't know why I'm here.
I'd rather cease to exist
Because then I won't be spoken to.
When people open their mouths to me
I wonder what they are doing.
Can't they tell I'm basically incompetent,
At conversing as they do?

And I want to love my mother.
Most of the time I'm sure I do,
But I'm not sure how to anymore.
That's what happens when you give but don't receive.
I want to flourish socially,
At least enough so I can manage to achieve something,
But it's getting harder it seems.
Sometimes I feel I can't be bothered
With just anything.
I feel kind of surreal,
Like things are happening but I'm not very there.
Sometimes I want my daydreams to all just go away,
But whilst I say that I am begging them to stay.
It makes me almost wish they could just give me antipsychotics,
And that they would help everything wrong with me that no one understands.
Even what seems expected to be understood,
It seems like no one does.
Once again, there's another way
Of how I am an outcast
Way more than once and for always.