At goodwill Buy the Pound every day is black friday Hundreds of soccer moms line up their white sneakers on a black and yellow caution tape line zombie over it streching for yu-gi-oh cards wait for hazmat suits to wheel out eight bins full of trash gone treasure. When the bins are locked in place the hazmat suits go back to pack another load
The air horn sounds. You do not want to be anywhere near that caution tape line when this happens. At goodwill buy the pound If you're not part of the fight, you're part of the floor. They need to find their puzzle peices lost in cat liter Johnny really needs every single nerf dart DID YOU TAKE A NERF DART?! WE TALKED ABOUT THIS JO-ANN THOSE WERE FOR JOHNNY. Johnnys grandma is not the only elder throwing elbows varacose veins are curb stomping dads hauling consoles to make a quick buck Skinny College aged video game collectors swim through the mom-pocalypse raid the stashes for disguarded NES cartridges Jo-ann grabs a twinky boy by the black graphic hoodie. Tosses him back into the horde lunges for a barbie doll hidden under some wires. This is not a place for nice children. If you aren't willing to push around some nanas you will leave covered in nike prints. This place turns people. Ever look at someones mom and think She looks like she's always wearing a mask. She is! Buy the pound is her natural habitat. One grandma keeps so many cats, her living room is a Petrie dish I think she just wants to be in charge of a small third world countrey. Granny needs to go rally up the soccer moms at buy the pound. To lead those cats into a mother thirfting revolution These woman leave feeling like they saved their family a fortune Dumpster diving for sport. Every tossed or trampled stranger One flip flop closer to feeding their children clawing through poverty
When that airhorn sounds again. They scurry back to their carts. Tell their children "Make sure nobody steals this" as they line back up in haste. Touch their all white nikes to the caution tape line. Hold their family close like brass knuckles. when that airhorn sounds. It's time to fight.