first it's the shock you can't even believe it. then comes the anger oh god the burning you'll feel inside. you hate him and hate him and curse him for every single happy memory he gave you. then the despair comes you're awake endless hours of the night, and you hate yourself and hate yourself and curse yourself for allowing yourself to fall in love with his demonic smile and unhallowed laugh. you cry your eyes red your sadness takes on a physical form. you don't eat. you don't sleep. you feel no compelling reason to be alive. the longer it was, the longer this lasts and every time you think you're getting better, you spiral down the drain again and suffocate in your own grief. you cut your skin and your veins are trying to accommodate all the alcohol diffusing into your blood. you scream at the top of your lungs you believe you are going insane and the only thought haunting you for the rest of your days is "why wasn't i good enough?" (e.s 'november fifteenth')
this is for anyone whose lover cheated. this is incredibly personal to me, as my boyfriend of two years had been cheating on me, and when i found out i haven't been the same.