you never liked the sun touching your face.
you wanted the night. its dark hiding your flaws.
you wanted to cry
but you were flaccid, like a wilted flower.
you wanted to love
but your blood tasted of running,
running, running.
because he told you to lie down,
and for a second you were hesitant.
you felt him hard between your legs,
but he still stopped when the alarm*
went off.

lightly child. lightly.
move your feet lightly. touch your memories gently.
because he told you how he and his mother never talked,
and you closed your eyes when he said
men should not hurt their wives.
lightly child, lightly.
you never liked the sun.
the way the rays exposed your skin to the world.
you wanted to sway.
you wanted to burn.
he never bothered to keep in touch
but you still think of him now and then.

you thought you would burst
from all these ugly feelings
but you held the explosion so tight
it melted inside your bog of depression.
in the midst of your sadness,
you cannot help but think about  
him,
her,
about the night that concealed all your flaws.
and you know that you are young
and you have so much time
to make things better.

you know,
and you are trying
just to leave your bed,
just to hold your legs back from running into the roads,
just to keep your head above the sea.

so love, draw back the curtains and
close your eyes.
*you never liked the sun touching your face.