I am not afraid of the depression anymore
I am a warrior
This is my body protesting the trauma and the injustice
I was born to stand up
For all the worlds mothers and daughters, sisters, aunties, fathers, cousins
My body is just trying to say listen to me now please
This pain cant be processed if you keep your eyes and mouth shut
Just listen in to the inner child
Nobody did
So you must
Only then can you help the others

No this is not true! I have to help them
Mine was nothing compared to others
Clouds rapidly gather
The thoughts become over whelming
I feel like vomiting and hear my stomach rumble
I am overwhelmed
Did it really happen to me?
Its not true!
Its not true!
So I numb body this morning as usual
With another spliff

In silence we mourn for now
Its just how it goes
Everyone that knows wonder how I can be functional
They say I am a survivor, an inspiration
Huh?
Truth is the real pain has begun only 10 years after
And I haven't been to work  much these days
I am a survivor but I am not functioning, I never did
Like i used to write back then in my diary
I was on autopilot
Destination - self destruction

Its not easy and I am just at the beginning of the end of this chapter

But I am no longer afraid of the depression